It's so rare that a terrible song comes out.

Oh sure, there are bland songs. Many, many bland songs that I have voiced hatred towards. But it's just not the same as a bona-fide terrible song, something so atrocious that you can't believe effort was put into it. I so rarely get to review songs like that on the Wonderland, and doing so is equal parts fun and painful. I think finding a song that someone tried to write is kind of like finding a bad movie with a lot of heart put into it. Think Ed Wood films. Or movies like Hobgoblins, Showgirls, Batman & Robin, or Birdemic. Or any of the original movies on the Syfy channel. Okay, okay, back to music! Something I have learned through listening to music of a different language is that bad music is universal. I've heard plenty of bad English songs and plenty of bad Japanese songs. And a few bad Korean songs, but that's not my point. Sometimes though there is a song probably written out of earnestness, but somewhere along the way, something goes wrong. Maybe the vocals are poorly sung, or the lyrics are juvenile, or even the music video is so awkwardly patched together, that the final result is a train wreck so cataclysmic you can't look away.

That is what Hello Kitty turned out to be.

Not the brand.

I know, Hello Kitty isn't a J-pop song and has no place on the Wonderland, but it's like one-sixteenth a J-pop song, so we're gonna talk about it. You guys all remember Avril Lavigne, right? No? Well, Avril Lavigne was/is a pop-punk singer who was more popular in the mid-2000s with middle school girls who weren't hardcore enough for actual punk music. I may or may not have been one of those middle school girls... Anyways, after her song Girlfriend, Avril Lavigne kind of just vanished. I knew that she was mildly popular in Japan, but I still didn't really care. But then it came. Just when I thought Avril Lavigne had disappeared to wherever mid-2000s singers go, Hello Kitty's music video came. Oh boy, did it come. Ever since Lavigne released the music video for Hello Kitty, both the song and music video have been the epitome of polarizing. The song has been ripped to shreds for its terrible Dubstep break, the bad lyrics, the gratuitous Japanese, and just being generally annoying. The biggest controversy though has been over the music video. The music video for Hello Kitty has been called racist and accused of cultural appropriation along the same lines of Gwen Stefani's Harajuku Girls back in the mid-2000s (next thing you know, she'll be making a comeback too).

Me, a white American girl, talking about cultural appropriation is the equivalent of stepping onto a minefield while wearing a blindfold. I just don't have a good perspective to talk about it let alone accuse other pieces of media being guilty of it. I grew up in a country that's a melting pot of cultures, that borrows from everything. So the concept's always been very fuzzy with me. Parts of it I understand like the misuse of sacred or religious objects (i.e. Native American warbonnets). But then there are parts of it that I just... don't get. Maybe it's because of that lack of a distinct cultural identity in my life, I don't know. But I'm not here to rant about Avril Lavigne's Hello Kitty music video being cultural appropriation, because I'm not sure if it really is or not. I mean, the only thing that seems remotely racist/appropriating about the music video are the dead-eyed Japanese backup dancers. But I figured they just looked that way because they realized what a god-awful song Hello Kitty was. In my eyes, Hello Kitty just comes off as very, very juvenile. You know, like a middle school weeaboo. It doesn't mean any harm, but may unintentionally cause some.

I could definitely see how people could be offended by the music video, but the song is so ridiculous. How can anyone even take it that seriously to find it offensive? Take the Japanese lyrics in the song... okay, yes, they're gratuitous and poorly pronounced. But guys... therearesomanyJ-popsongswithEnglishlyricsinthem. And some of those lyrics don't even make sense with the rest of the song! I love a lot of Nakata Yasutaka's work, but theguyputstons of randomEnglishintohisworks. Nobody ever seemed to get irritated over Kyarypamyupamyu's English lyrics in her songs or the boatload of grammatical errors in BiS's two English songs. I mean, can't we just be thankful that Avril Lavigne didn't try to sing the entire song in Japanese? Then again, maybe that would have been better... at least I wouldn't be able to understand the abysmal English lyrics. The Japanese lyrics awkwardly thrown around in Hello Kitty only make me wonder if random English lyrics in J-pop songs sounds just as forced. If this song were being sung by a Japanese girl, would reactions be different? Maybe. I don't know.

But do you know what I do know about Hello Kitty? IT'S TERRIBLE!

Instead of fighting over whether or not Hello Kitty is racist and/or cultural appropriation, can't we all just agree that the song and music video are terrible? Hello Kitty is a song that's only going to appeal to middle schoolers going through their weeaboo phase. Hell, it even sounds like it was written by a middle schooler. "Mom's not home tonight so we can roll around, have a pillow fight like a major rager OMFG"? Have you heard anyone over the age of 13 say that? I just can't believe Avril Lavigne was nearly 30 when she wrote this. Like this person is an adult, and she wrote this. Even the shitty English versions of Perfume songs I wrote in middle school were better-written than this. I have listened to some shitty music. Hell, I reviewed an Ayaman Japan song, so trust me, I have. But Hello Kitty is something that was gift-wrapped for music reviewers like me to tear into. It's terrible in the way that Beckii Cruel's Danjo was terrible. In fact, I wonder which one would stand as a more terrible song? Cruel's awkward and lifeless cover of Danjo with its equally awkward music video? Or Lavigne's immature and annoying Hello Kitty and its tasteless music video?

In my opinion, there is nothing gained in wasting time brooding over terrible things. Because when you allow yourself to linger on something you hate, you're still thinking about it. When you get bit by a venomous snake, do you sit around with the poison in your body complaining about how much it hurts? I'd hope not. No, you're gonna go to a hospital and get that poison sucked out! You have to do the same when you find something that ticks you off. If you go around saying how much you hate something, you're still giving it attention and allowing it to plant itself into others' minds and stay relevant for just a little bit longer. If I find something that I truly, sincerely hate (and that is a very small list), then I don't talk about it. I allow as little of my brain capacity as possible to think about it. Because why should I allow myself to think about something I hate when I could use that same brainpower analyzing something I'm actually enthusiastic or passionate about? Frankly, it's exhausting trying to maintain hatred of something. That's why I always marvel at people who somehow manage to hate idol groups. I mean think of all the stamina they must have...

In the end, I don't hate Hello Kitty, but I can understand if someone else does. It is a horrid song that has an equally horrid music video. I don't know about all that cultural appropriation and racism, but a bad music video is a bad music video. And even though Hello Kitty is completely insipid, it's kind of refreshing to hear something so insipid. I mean, I've reviewed so much bland music lately. And AKB48's new song is a walk in the dog park of blandness. Hello Kitty is the tackiest, most over-the-top kind of bad you can hear, and I find it to be very, very entertaining. It's like watching a bad movie. Some people enjoy watching bad movies for the fun of it, and others don't. I think the same thing applies to Avril Lavigne's song. I wouldn't say Hello Kitty is the Manos: The Hands of Fate of bad pop music. It's more like... the Battlefield Earth of pop music. Actual effort was put into it and its creators take pride in it, but the final result is something so unintentionally terrible that it winds up being this weird, twisted form of entertainment.

And if you personally find Hello Kitty to be offensive... don't give it the power to stick around. If someone asks you about it, emphasize what a waste of time it is, and how it's not even worth watching. This controversy will die down as controversy always does, and one day I think many people will look back on this song and laugh. And hopefully just forget about the tacky music video. If you want to see a "kawaii" music video, go check out Kyarypamyupamyu's stuff or even Hanae's if you want something a little more toned down. As for me, I will now return to my regularly scheduled broadcasting of J-pop.

Deeming Nogizaka46's string of good singles not a fluke is a concept that scares me.


I mean, don't get me wrong, I love that Nogizaka46 has finally gotten some decent music and some really good music videos. They're pretty much the only '48 group that I've found interesting lately. But I keep wondering, "Will it last?" Is Nogizaka46 going to reach the same point that AKB48 has and stagnate? Or did they already go through their phase of god-awful songs? Have the producers of Nogizaka46 just finally gotten their shit together and figured out what sound and image works best for Nogizaka46? Around the time of Seifuku no Mannequin, I wasn't sure. At the time, I was half-convinced that song was just a fluke, along with the music video. Kimi no Na wa Kibou was a very pretty, albeit simple song. Then Girl's Rule came along, and that was a fun summer song with a surprisingly pretty, nostalgic music video. And then Barrette broke into a men's club carrying machine guns and became the best '48 release of 2013. Barrette set a pretty high bar for Nogizaka46's next single, musically and visually. I wasn't sure if Nogizaka46 would be able to top that. Now here we are. Kizuitara Kataomoi is, crazily enough, Nogizaka46's eighth single and their first of the chunk of '48 singles we can expect this year. Now how does Kizuitara Kataomoi hold up against AKB, SKE, NMB, and HKT's spring singles?

My verdict? It's the best one so far.

My hope is that Nogizaka46 will release an eve better song this year than Kizuitara Kataomoi, but you know, baby steps. I've found that the easiest thing to do when expecting idol releases is... not to expect them. I'm not saying keep expectations low, just don't hold any. Be prepared for anything to happen, good or bad. That being said... Kizuitara Kataomoi is beautiful. Good god, I could listen to this song all day. Actually, I kind of have. It's one of the idol songs this year I've been playing the most. And it's one of the first singles this year to stick in my head easily. What to say about this song, what to say... well, other than the fact that it's wonderful. I wouldn't say Kizuitara is a ballad, it's too upbeat for that, but there is still a very wistful tone to the song. I actually like that the song isn't a ballad, and you'll see why when I talk about the PV. And there's something about the song structure that's very... different from what I thought it was going to sound like. I mean different in a good way! Like the way the verses are sung very quickly and then the chorus slows down is a strange vocal choice, but it surprisingly works well. In fact, I think that distinct vocal structure (that doesn't sound like every other '48 song) just made Kizuitara Kataomoi stand out even more.

You know what song Kizuitara Kataomoi reminds me most of? Connect by ClariS. Connect is definitely more orchestral but the general sound of both songs is very similar. They're both uplifting songs with pretty piano, light, delicate vocals, and a gorgeous key change at some point. God, I am such a sucker for key changes. Even in terrible songs, I still like the key changes. And the one in Kizuitara Kataomoi is gorgeous. Connect is one of my favorite idol songs, so its similarities to Kizuitara Kataomoi are completely okay with me. I'd rather it be similar to Connect than to other '48 songs. As I said before, this is a very pretty song. The strings in particular struck me as pretty, along with the subtle piano played throughout the song. I just love the entire arrangement of Kizuitara Kataomoi, and it keeps growing on me the more I listen to the song. I mean, I already liked Kizuitara Kataomoi on my first listen, but I feel like each time I replay it, the song sounds better. I guess the song is just like wine and gets better with time.

Something else that I like about Kizuitara Kataomoi are the lyrics. The only time I really pay attention to idol lyrics is when they're good lyrics. A majority of Aki-P's lyrics aren't really worth talking about, but I find Kizuitara Kataomoi's to be surprisingly touching. I guess because I find unrequited love to be a more interesting topic to sing about than the other kind? And there's just something about Kizuitara Kataomoi's lyrics that sounds very, very sad. Reading the translation, I can just hear the desperation and conflicted frustration and bitter acceptance in the lyrics of the song. The lyrics being well-written just make Kizuitara Kataomoi an even better song! I'm serious, this is probably so far my favorite '48 release this year, and considering most groups' outputs, it will probably end up being my favorite overall. Unless another group decides to blow me away again. Which I don't expect happening any time soon. After all, it's not like me using reverse psychology would work, right? Back to Kizuitara Kataomoi, I really do love this song. The song has such a beautiful and memorable tone to it. Kizuitara Kataomoi may even be my favorite Nogizaka46 song. It at least tops Barrette!

But that's just songs. Barrette was an all right song, and there are many '48 songs that are better. The real question is this: can Kizuitara Kataomoi's PV top Barrette? I mean the PV for Barrette was freaking awesome. It would be damn hard for Nogizaka46 to come up with an even better PV than Barrette. So did they? Only one way to find out!


How does Kizuitara Kataomoi begin? With a dandelion, a single little dandelion that will prove very important to this story.


And also there's Nanase, member of Nogizaka46 who will also prove very important to this story!


Mainly because she's dying of an unspecified illness.


It's probably the same one that Matsui Jurina died of in Sakura no Ki ni Narou.


Now since there are captions in this music video, I'm just going to repost the English translations from this subbed video. This one says, "Am I dead?"


"God... I beg you for some more time..."


Well, everything's blurred, there's a bright light, this can only mean one thing...


This is a pretty shot, very ethereal. Which makes sense given the context of the PV.


There is nothing worse than that gut-drop feeling when you're told a loved one has died.


I'm not completely sure what happens in this scene, but Mai's involvement is important.


"The time I can stay on this world, maybe as long as the dandelion still has seeds."


Here's Nanase, looking very much alive!


And even better, she's center of Nogizaka46's next single!


What could possibly go wrong now, am I right?


Let's just hope that little dandelion left in the middle of a field doesn't lose its seeds!


"In this case, time is running out."


Mai obviously understands the gravity of the situation.


"Nanase, you push yourself too much."


Ah, a rooftop, the best place to hold insightful conversations and confess things!


"For me, there is not enough time."


Another attempt by Nanase to lessen awkwardness between herself and Mai...


...unfortunately does not go as well as planned.


Rina properly calls out Mai for her prickly behavior towards Nanase.


"You behave so cold because of jealousy, don't you?"


I actually really like Mai's character in this PV. Usually, that rival/antagonist character is very trite, but Mai's emotions feel very justified.


I mean, she's only acting so cold to distance herself from the knowledge that Nanase can't stick around forever.


"It's not true! It's only because Mai is worried about my health..."


And then... the inevitable happens.


The dandelion starts to wear down and so does Nanase.


But that doesn't stop Mai from rushing out to protect the little dandelion.


How long can she protect before the elements blow it away though?


"I will protect Nanase's life."


I actually feel really sorry for Mai in this PV, you can tell how much Nanase's immutable death is affecting her.


And it makes her hug with Nanase afterward all the more heartwarming.


Actually, this entire part is very, very heartwarming.


"Everybody... Sorry I've kept it as a secret."


Another insightful rooftop conversation with Nanami.


This time Nanase's reflecting on how grateful she is to be able to perform.


And now the members give their all into preparing for the performance!


Despite the dandelions seeds slowly blowing away...


Even though Nanase coughs up seeds (What?), she still perseveres!


Of course they take a picture for memory!


The night of the performance arrives, with Nanase not doing so well.


Nonetheless, she gets on stage and they all dance the night away!


Meanwhile, the dandelion grows smaller and smaller...


...until finally there are no seeds left.


And so Nanase gives one last look to her team members and friends.


Then, with no ties left to this earth, she disappears into a puff of dandelion seeds.


And in my opinion, that makes for a perfect ending to this little story.


I do wonder how the girls explained that to the audience though...


The final shot lingers on the last picture of Nanase, with a dandelion seed (very subtly) fallen over her head, thus concluding our story.

Wow... just... wow. I'm not being facetious, that really was my first reaction when I watched the PV for Kizuitara Kataomoi. And that was before I even knew what the music video was really about! The story for Kizuitara Kataomoi is simple, but I was completely invested watching the entire music video for the first time. Because while Kizuitara Kataomoi story's is simple, it's a good story. To really know what the music video was about though, I did need some more context, which is my way of saying I needed subtitles. Unlike some music videos that have unnecessary subtitles, I highly recommend watching Kizuitara Kataomoi with subtitles if you do not speak Japanese. You can still follow the story without subtitles, but many of the little gaps are filled when you know understand the writing and the dialogue. In fact, here's a video with the subtitles. There, you don't even have to actively search for one now! So what are you waiting for!? Watch it! Love it! Build a shrine to- okay, not that last one. But do enjoy the music video for Kizuitara Kataomoi, because it is a good one. Maybe even better than Barrette...

As you can deduce, I am completely enthralled with Kizuitara Kataomoi. I love the story, the connection to the song, the ending, everything. It actually reminds me very much of a fairy tale told in a contemporary setting. A girl almost dies but is given one more chance to live so long as this one little dandelion keeps its seeds. But nature marches on and the dandelion can only keeps its seeds for so long, and the girl is able to give one final performance as center of Nogizaka46 before dissolving into a bunch of little dandelion seeds. I mean, couldn't you see that as a Hans Christian Anderson story!? Well, maybe without all the religious morals, but still! I like how the story of Kizuitara Kataomoi is simple and doesn't try to explain how a weed is keeping a girl alive or why said girl dissolves into dandelions at the end. It just presents a story and expects the viewer to go along with the strange circumstances the same way the characters in the story do. Just like a fairy tale! And I also love how the story is interwoven with elements of real life and Nogizaka46 itself. That realism combined with fantasy gives the story much more poignancy. It even adds sadness to the PV because you just know how much stress all these girls go through striving for a center position.

To me, Kizuitara Kataomoi is as sad as, maybe even sadder than, Sakura no Ki ni Narou. But it's hard to compare since both are so similar and so good. Both music videos involve the death of a friend along with flowers and- hold on. Is Kizuitara to Nogizaka46 what Sakura no Ki ni Narou was to AKB48? Two beautiful PVs with slight otherworldly themes that involve passing on? I guess if I wanted to explore the rivalry aspect of Nogizaka46 (lord knows I'd do it better than AKS does), I could easily make several comparisons between Kizuitara Kataomoi and Sakura no Ki ni Narou. And they're both spring singles! Wait a minute... does that also make Barrette for Nogizaka46 the same to what Beginner was for AKB48? Of course, not in terms of songs; Barrette as a song can't even compare to Beginner. But as for the music videos... both Beginner and Barrette's PVs were dark and surprisingly violent for their respective idol groups. Is Nogizaka46 turning into a better version of AKB48!? Is their summer single going to feature nods to their previous music videos a la Everyday Kachuusha!? But then they'd have to make a nod to Oide Shampoo... eugh.

Back on subject, Kizuitara Kataomoi's PV is definitely up there with the sad idol music videos I've watched. The PV doesn't have me crying buckets or anything, but when I was watching it, I still felt sad. It was a... bittersweet kind of sad. You know, the kind when you know something's going to happen and you know you can't prevent it, so you just try your best to come to terms with it until it happens. That kind of sad... it kind of sucks. The more I think about it, I don't really see a lot of truly sad idol PVs. Lots of happy ones, serious ones, bright ones, edgy ones, cheap ones, but never any that make me feel sad while watching them. I can maybe count on one hand the number of sad idol PVs that I've watched. Kizuitara Kataomoi invoked a lot of the same emotions from me that Sakura no Ki ni Narou did. There was just the right amount of story and emotion that the PV didn't come as melodramatic or phony. I like also that the PV is only around 10 minutes long as opposed to a full-blown drama PV; I think lengthening the story would just kill the emotional levels of the PV. That's why so many of AKB48's "drama PVs" fail for me. They don't properly raise the stakes, and spend too much time meandering and not doing anything interesting. With Kizuitara Kataomoi, they don't waste much time in telling the story and showing how it effects the girls in the PV.

I think the only thing I may have liked to see more of in Kizuitara Kataomoi is the more magical side of the story. The idea is great and The outdoors shots showing the dandelion are beautiful, and it would have been nice to explore more nature scenes like that. But other than that, I don't really have any other criticisms for this PV. I will admit, initially I didn't really get any connection between the meaning of the song and the PV. The song is about unrequited love between a girl and a boy, and the music video is obviously not. But the more I thought about it, I realized that maybe the unrequited love in the PV is between Nanase and her desire to perform in Nogizaka46. It kind of fits with the story, and I think gives even more poignance to the PV. Even if that's not what the music video is supposed to mean, I still felt like there was a lot of good emotion in this PV. Acting in idol PVs ranges from decent to Z-movie material, and the acting in Kizuitara Kataomoi thankfully falls closer to the former. Again, it's a simple storyline that only requires simple emotions, and I think the girls handled those emotions well.

Overall, I'm impressed with Kizuitara Kataomoi more than I ever thought I would be. After Barrette, I kind of figured that whatever Nogizaka46 released next probably wouldn't be as good, but Kizuitara Kataomoi is amazing. I think at this point I can say that Nogizaka46's string of good singles isn't a fluke anymore. I don't know how, but at some point management got their shit together and started developing a better image and better songs for Nogizaka46. Now I think I finally understand what Nogizaka46's management is going for with them. What I get from watching their music videos is a cleaner, simpler, and more classic image than any of their sister groups. Even the way they dress is very reminiscent of older idol groups such as Onyanko Club. I think Nogizaka46 works better as the "updated" version of an 80s idol group more than they do as "rivals" of AKB48. Although considering the sales of Kizuitara Kataomoi have been their highest yet, Nogizaka46 might be more formidable rivals to AKB48 now than they've ever been in the past. I think Kizuitara Kataomoi is my favorite music video from them. This one or Barrette. The PV for Kizuitara has a wonderful story and a wonderful way of exploring that story, making for a music video that is both enchanting and melancholic.


Yeah, this is a five apples kind of release. I think Kizuitara Kataomoi is Nogizaka46's strongest release yet, and I can only hope that their next single is even stronger. Kizuitara Kataomoi is a beautiful song with a really distinct melody that's refreshing to hear from a '48 group. The music video matches perfectly to video, delivering a wonderfully sweet and even sad story that had me invested the entire time. Whether Nogizaka46's follow-up to this will be good or bad, I can't say, but I'm (tentatively) anticipating it.

Who didn't see this coming?


What I like about Morning Musume lately, member-wise, is that it's really easy to tell who's going to graduate. Most of the girls are still relatively new to the group, so it's pretty obvious the only real members fans have to worry about graduating are the Platinum Era members. And now the last of the Platinum Era, Michishige Sayumi has finally announced that she too will be graduating at the end of Momusu's fall tour. Depending on who you are, you're either jumping for joy or crying into a pillow. Me personally, I can't say that this announcement took me by surprise. Had the announcement been two years ago, I would have been a lot more surprised. But now, with Sayu being the Morning Musume member with the longest tenure, it's far from surprising. In fact, I feel like lately I've been doing a really good job at expecting graduations. I know that any H!P members graduating are going to be the older ones, and AKB48 has too many members I don't care about that are graduating. All of the younger members aren't going anywhere anytime soon; it's basically all the veterans that are moving on to non-idol pastures. Now if only I could apply that same expectancy to disbanding groups. I still can't believe that BiS is disbanding, and now I have to add Bump.y to the mix.

Back to Sayu, I was either expecting her to graduate in late 2014 or early-to-mid 2015. She's been leader of Morning Musume for 2 years, she's about to be 25, and she can hold a career for herself in variety outside of Momusu. She'll be more than fine outside of the group. What interests me (what always interests me whenever a prominent member graduates) is how Sayu's graduation is going to affect Morning Musume. Obviously, someone else will have to take the leader position, but I'm not sure if it's going to Mizuki or Haruna or if the both of them will be joint leaders. I guess Ikuta Erina for sub-leader isn't happening any time soon. Also, the 12th Generation will be entering into the picture at some point; probably Sayu will introduce them at her graduation concert, and then they'll debut with the group in 2015. I do wonder how that will also affect the group dynamic, if at all. The most interesting thing about Sayumi leaving to me is that her departure marks the last of the Platinum Era members leaving the group. Think about it; after Sayu leaves, all the Momusu music videos from Morning Coffee to Onna to Otoko no Lullaby Game will have no current members in them. Watching old music videos will be even weirder now that everyone who's in them up to Maji Desu ka Ska! is gone!

I know that Michishige Sayumi has always been one of the most divisive members in Morning Musume, and Hello! Project in general. It's really weird though, because when I read comments and articles about people who hate her, they really hate her. I can see where that comes from though; Sayu's always been infamous for her "Poison Tongue" personality on TV along with her narcissistic act of being the cutest member in Morning Musume. Actually, she is pretty adorable... and she doesn't even looked like she's aged that much in the past decade... Maybe she's a vampire who doesn't suck blood but sucks youth instead! What was I talking about again? Ah, yes, Sayu's idol personality. I say idol personality, because everyone knows that Sayu's poison tongue/narcissist personality is mostly fabricated. But I do wonder if any of that ever leaked over into her real personality. I mean eleven years is a long time to maintain that persona. Personally, I never really found Sayu to be all that offensive. That's probably because I've never watched much of any Momusu television programs or even Sayu's appearances outside of Momusu in variety shows.

But in Morning Musume singles, I liked Sayu. Once Momusu started getting younger new members, all the old members of the group sort of stuck out. Like you could tell there was a clear gap between the old and new generations. Visually, Sayu seemed to fit in really well with the 9th and 10th Generation, especially once Reina graduated. I don't want to say I won't miss Sayu, because I do like her presence as an older generation member in Morning Musume. But I also think that now is a god time for her to go. I mean, think of all the eras she's been through! Sayu has been a member from Shabondama to now; that's over a decade of different lineups and images. And I'd like to think that she left a mark on Morning Musume. Maybe not as a great singer (lord no) or a great dancer, but as a girl who started out with no talent whatsoever and still found a niche for herself in Morning Musume. Sure, that niche generated a lot of backlash, but if there's one motto in the entertainment world, it's that there's no such thing as bad publicity. I have to admit, I'm surprisingly chill about this graduation announcement. Now if one of the 9th or 10th gen. girls announces graduation, that will take me by surprise. But I get the feeling that's a long ways away. So farewell to Sayumi, may her Poison Tongue grace many variety shows!

Oh yeah, it's back. Grab your sonic screwdriver, because we are going back in time.

How long has it been since my last Time Capsule Review? A year? Well, I want to bring this back! Why? Because I missed doing this, and I think a few readers missed it too. I will say though that Time Capsule Reviews are going to be a little more different than they were a year ago. For one thing, it's not restricted just to Perfume music videos. Okay, I know that this is a Perfume review, but I will open Time Capsule Reviews to other idols, both active and disbanded. Speaking of which, criteria for monthly Time Capsule Reviews has also changed. Instead of drawing names out of a hat, I've decided to review something that was released the same month I'm doing that Time Capsule Review. For example, Perfume released GAME April 16, 2008, so that's why it's going to be my April Time Capsule Review. That being said, if you have any old releases you'd like me to review that fall within a certain month, just drop it by me via commenting, email, Twitter, etc.! For now though, I'm just gonna have a poll with five or six old releases each month, and you guys can vote on which one you want me to review! I'll keep the poll up for the first half of the month, then close it to start reviewing the release that got the most votes. And if no one votes... I'll just pick then! Yay! Everyone wins!

But I am picking the first new Time Capsule Review. Why? Because it's Perfume's GAME, and a GAME review is long overdue on the Wonderland.


Look at that album cover. Such finesse, such class, such quality. To think that this album was released six years ago. Has time really gone by so quickly? I'm just gonna go ahead and say that I love GAME. It still stands as my favorite Perfume album and one of my favorite albums in general. And a lot of Perfume fans also have GAME as their favorite Perfume album. Why though? What makes GAME such a great album in comparison to Perfume's other three albums? Is it nostalgia or is GAME just a genuinely great album that showcases the best of Perfume? Well considering this blog basically exists because of Perfume, I think it's more than overdue that I pay tribute to their first original album, the one that also happens to be my favorite. As of now, GAME is still Perfume's best-selling album, and I think it rightly deserves to be. There's a great variety of songs on the album, and if you're interested in getting into Perfume, then I enthusiastically recommend listening to GAME. I will warn you, most of this review is just me gushing over Perfume, but it's not like you guys aren't used to that. Enough of this intro, let's play the game. The review game. That sounded a lot more clever in my head...

1. Polyrhythm

Opening the album is the song that started it all. I feel like it's almost pointless to talk about Polyrhythm since it's without a doubt Perfume's most well-known song. I will admit that over the past few years, Polyrhythm can feel a little overplayed. It's what Love Machine was to Morning Musume, so Perfume has a tendency to perform it a lot, along with one other song on this album. But overplaying aside, does that diminish the value of Polyrhythm? ...I don't think so. Because when I sit down and listen to Polyrhythm again, it's still a great song. The buildup into the chorus is great, and the best part of the entire song is that polyrhythmic bridge. I highly recommend watching a live performance of Polyrhythm just so you can see the girls dance to that bridge. Polyrhythm is iconic in Perfume's discography, but still stands the test of time as a great song. And seeing how it was Perfume's first single to make it big, I think it's the perfect song to open GAME.

My Rating:


2. Plastic smile

And immediately the next song on GAME is an album song! I remember first listening to Plastic smile and thinking it was going to be really robotic for some reason. It's actually not; Plastic smile is a very cheerful song. The English in the lyrics is, "Crack a smile, come up smile, flash a smile, plastic smile." They're very catchy! I'm not sure if that was deliberate or Nakata looking for works with the same vowel structure as plastic smile, but hey, very cheerful! Actually, what I like about Plastic smile is the dissonance between the lyrics and the music. Plastic smile is one of the most upbeat songs GAME, but the lyrics are about discontent and stagnancy within a relationship. For such a cute song, the lyrics make Plastic smile kind of depressing! But I still enjoy the song a lot; the chorus in particular is a lot of fun to sing along to! I could actually see this song being used in a commercial, and it may have been. Either way, Plastic smile is a neat song and one of my favorites off of GAME.

My Rating:


3. GAME

Before edge, GAME was Perfume's closest song to having the darker and trancier sound that made edge such a popular song. While edge is my favorite Perfume song, GAME also comes very close to the top of that list. I really like the placement of this track on GAME. Polyrhythm and Plastic smile are both great tracks, but they're also very upbeat songs. GAME on the other hand is an edgy dance song that features much more minimal lyrics than either of those first two songs. The contrast adds a nice variety to GAME. Also, this song makes for one sick live performance. I mean... not that I would know... I just watched the performance from Tokyo Dome online, but from that alone, I could tell that GAME is an awesome song live. And the song itself has such a great buildup into the chorus; I can hear the instrumental just get harder and louder until it reaches the chorus. The chorus of GAME is simple but effective, and overall, GAME (the song) is a powerful listen all the way through.

My Rating:


4. Baby cruising Love

After GAME, Baby cruising Love slows things down. I wouldn't say Baby cruising Love is a ballad, but the tempo is slower than most of the other songs on GAME. I don't know why, but I never know what to say when I talk about Baby cruising Love. Of all the A-sides on GAME, I find it to be one of the weaker ones. Not that it's a bad song, but in comparison to Polyrhythm and Macaroni and Chocolate Disco, Baby cruising Love stands a little bit lower. But it is a very nice song. I think what I like most about Baby cruising Love are the lyrics and the vocals. The lyrics talk about being with someone in this very... cosmic way. The girls mention space, voyages, and long journeys. I don't know how to explain it, but it works! The best part of the Baby cruising Love is the very end when the girls sing separate parts overlapping one another. When I'm in the right mood, Baby cruising Love is a very cool song to listen to, but even when I'm not, it's still a pretty good song.

My Rating:


5. Chocolate Disco

Here's another well-known song from Perfume's discography! Chocolate Disco, one of Perfume's most over-performed concert songs. I wonder, do the girls ever get tired of constantly performing Chocolate Disco and Polyrhythm? I will admit, I do get tired of Chocolate Disco since it's performed so much. But when I don't listen to it for awhile, I find myself enjoying this song all over again! Chocolate Disco is a fun song and not much else. But that isn't necessarily a bad thing! Because Chocolate Disco excels at being a fun song. The chorus is extremely catchy; I can see why Kimura Kaela played the song so much on her radio show. The lyrics to Chocolate Disco are just about the easiest to remember, even to someone who doesn't speak Japanese. So no, it isn't deep or poetic, but it is an extremely happy song. And coming after the hard dance song GAME and slower Baby cruising Love, Chocolate Disco is a nice transition to a peppier sound.

My Rating:


6. Macaroni

And then slowing it down after the party song that was Chocolate Disco is the lounge-y Macaroni. Macaroni definitely isn't a ballad, but it is a very slow, very chill song. Actually, Macaroni is a great song to listen to on a rainy day. Or any day where you're at home relaxing with nothing to do. Even when you're doing stuff. Just listen to this song. I think Macaroni's really grown on me in the past few years. There are very few times when I'm not stressed out, and Macaroni is a good song to listen to when I am under stress. The song is just so calming and slow. I always feel very relaxed after listening to Macaroni. The music video is also really good, and I highly recommend checking it out. I like Macaroni being in the middle of GAME. It's like a calming interlude between the really energetic Chocolate Disco and the more upbeat song following it. Honestly, I'd love to hear more of this side of Perfume in their current music, like with Furikaeru to Iru yo.

My Rating:


7. Ceramic Girl

Ceramic Girl is a funny little song. When I first started listening to it, I thought it was all right. The chorus was cute and I did like the fast nature of the lyrics. But not much about Ceramic Girl really stuck out to me (except for the title). That is... until I got to the bridge. Like Polyrhythm, the best part about Ceramic Girl is the bridge in the middle of the second and last chorus. The second chorus ends with the last word, "girl" being repeated over and over. And then it starts getting faster. And faster. And faster and faster and faster until BAM! All the music drops and then the chorus kicks back in. I loved that part back when I first listened to Ceramic Girl and love it just as much today! I'm actually surprised Nakata never made an extended mix of Ceramic Girl. That bridge is practically remix-bait, and considering his penchant for remixes, you'd think he'd be all over that. Oh well, in its original form, Ceramic Girl is a pretty fun, happy song with a standout bridge followed by more fun and happiness.

My Rating:


8. Take me Take me

This song is definitely the most divisive on GAME. I feel like fans either love it or hate it. I can see why some fans wouldn't like it. It's a repetitive song, and the lyrics are only slightly more creative than the ones in Spending all my time. Personally though, Take me Take me is one of my favorite Perfume songs. So what makes it better than Spending all my time? Well, unlike Spending all my time, Take me Take me has atmosphere. This is a moody, sensual song, and the minimal lyrics work really well in adding to that moodiness. To really get Take me Take me, I highly recommend watching the live from Perfume's GAME Tour. Take me Take me is a mature song (it's very heavily implied the song is about intercourse), and the choreography for Take me Take me highlights both the maturity and sensuality of the song. If you're unsure about Take me Take me, listen to the song a few times to see if it grows on you. For me, the song is like wine; it gets better with time.

My Rating:


9. Secret Secret

Ahhh yes, Secret Secret, one of the best songs on this album and one of the best songs by Perfume in general. Do you ever listen to a song and have this feeling of absolute awe rush over you like a wave? Even after the song is over, you just kind of sit there with this feeling of having listened to something truly incredible. That is what happened when I listened to Secret Secret. Oh god, what is not great about this song? The fake-out opening is classic, the vocal structure is perfect, the instrumental is the right blend of edgy and soft, Secret Secret is just a wonderful, wonderful song that makes me grateful that Amuse kept Perfume around after Perfume ~Complete Best~. I know I sound like I'm gushing, but if you haven't listened to Secret Secret, please do so. Musically, the song is an eargasm, and I love the lyrics to Secret Secret. The song is all about the relationship between a performer and their fan, which only adds even more poignancy to the song. Absolutely my favorite song off of GAME.

My Rating:


10. Butterfly

The biggest complaint I hear about Butterfly is that it's too repetitive. And.. yeah, it is really repetitive. Most the song consists of Perfume singing Butterfly for roughly sixteen counts, then signing a few verses. Rinse and repeat. But... I still really like Butterfly. At first, I did think it was a little too monotonous, but much like Take me Take me, Butterfly has a really great atmosphere. I recommend watching the Budokan clip of Butterfly; I think it adds to the song with some very entrancing visuals. Butterfly took awhile to grow on me, but now I like it a lot. I actually love how long it is. Those long notes the girls hold while singing Butterfly are just so captivating. And the instrumental sounds almost tropical at times. I think had the instrumental of Butterfly been more boring, then I wouldn't like the song as much. But when I listen to Butterfly, I evokes all these trippy, colorful images of butterflies in my head. Butterfly's just kind of a trippy, but cool song. Personally, I like it a lot.

My Rating:


11. Twinkle snow Powdery snow

Okay... I... actually, I think Twinkle snow Powdery snow is the weakest song on the entire album. Now that doesn't mean this song is bad, it's just... kind of underwhelming compared to everything else? My feelings about Twinkle snow Powdery snow are weird. In the late fall and winter, around November through February, I enjoy listening to this song. I think it's a great winter song, especially with that very Christmas-y opening. But when the weather gets warmer, I don't really like listening to this song that much. Twinkle snow Powdery snow is such a distinctively winter song. The lyrics are about snow, the PV is about snow, I don't want to listen to a song about snow when it's 102 degrees outside. Twinkle snow Powdery snow is still a fun, cute song, but if I could choose between it and say, Seventh Heaven to go on GAME, then I'd go with the latter. Ask me about this song again around December and maybe I'll feel differently about it then.

My Rating:


12. Puppy love

One of my favorite Perfume songs EVER! Okay, I've been saying that about a lot of the songs on GAME, but Puppy love is still one of them! I think this song is adorable. It's just so sweet and heartfelt, and oh, I just get warm fuzzies thinking about this song! So a few years ago I actually learned the dance to this song for fun along with the words. In fact, I still know the lyrics to Puppy love. I'm not sure why; I guess they just got stuck in my head easily. Yeah, in case you can't tell yet, I really love this song, and I love that it's the song that closes out GAME. Puppy love is a happy Perfume song, happy in the sweetest way a Perfume song can be. I love the opening of the song too; it reminds me of the intro to Linus and Lucy. And everything after that is just as wonderful! Like with Macaroni, I feel better when I listen to Puppy love. Something about how it's so blithe and happy puts on a smile on my face. I'm even smiling right now as I type this!

My Rating:


The Verdict

Well, there you have it. I love this album so much. In my opinion, GAME is Perfume's best album. Why? Because it shows all the best sides of their music. You want a happy Perfume song? GAME has Plastic smile, Chocolate Disco, Ceramic Girl, and Puppy love? You want a slow Perfume song? GAME has Macaroni. You want a darker Perfume song? GAME has GAME, Take me Take me, and Butterfly? You want an awesome song? The problems that I've had with Perfume's subsequent albums are that they don't have a very good balance of musical styles. JPN was too light and lacking in original content, ⊿ was too heavy on electronic effects, and Level3 had Mirai no Museum. There isn't a single track that I wouldn't want on GAME. Not even Twinkle snow Powdery snow. Although I would have loved if Seventh Heaven had made it to the album. Anyways, the balance of different styles and sounds on this album is near-perfect. A lot of my favorite Perfume songs come from GAME, and for good reason. GAME is just the right amount of fun, happy technopop and dark, edgy technopop and everything else in-between.

But back to the question I proposed: is GAME a great album because of nostalgia or because it stands on its own merits as a great album? I think for me, it's a little bit of both. GAME came out just when I was getting into Perfume. In fact, I remember going on Youtube and listening to the songs because I didn't know how to download an album back then. I remember watching Secret Secret and feeling absolutely blown away by this trio of girls not much older than me dancing to such different music to my ears. When I listen to GAME now, I can't help but have that nostalgia overcome me. But when I listen to GAME, I also realize all over again why I love Perfume so much. For most artists, I'll have phases where I listen to them on heavy rotation, then forget about them for some time before picking them up again. That's not the case with Perfume. When I listen to GAME, it's like listening to a reminder of why I follow and write about (and even gush about) Perfume. I can still play GAME and feel like I'm listening to it for the first time. There isn't a single song I would take off the album; each song on GAME shows just how great Perfume's music can be when Nakata's on a roll. If you want to get into Perfume, then GAME is an album you definitely should listen to.


GAME abso-freaking-lutely gets five apples. There is a reason that GAME is my favorite Perfume album, and I think I just went over that in this review. Now what will next month's Time Capsule Review be? It's up to you! There's a poll with five May releases in it, and as of now, any of them could be the Time Capsule Review! So if you want one to be reviewed, go vote! Or not! It's up to you! But I will ask you guys this: what Perfume album is your favorite? Is it GAME? Not GAME? None of them at all?

Guess what? I'M GRADUATING SOON! In a little more than three weeks to be exact, and I'm totally not counting down the days or anything... I am so enthralled that this semester is about to be over; it's been awful. I've had to deal with some really time-consuming classes and an even more time-consuming graduation project. Speaking of which, I'm presenting that graduation project tonight! The judges I'm presenting to will then determine whether I pass or fail, also determining whether or not I'm allowed to graduate! I just love having a single project hinder on twelve years of school work! I really am happy though to almost be done with that, and I really hope the judges pass me. I guess I'm kind of paranoid that they won't. Next week, I also have a majority of my exams. I've already had my biology exam, so that means I just have four exams left! My last exam is on May 16, and even then, all the other exams before that should be done by May 7. However I won't be blogging much next week. I may post one or two reviews this weekend that I planned to write in may though. Anyways, enough about my school life, what matters on the Wonderland are the J-pop songs I plan on reviewing this May! Ah, the month of May, it's often the month when the summer idol PVs start rolling in! It is not the month I thought Perfume would release a single. But oh well. I've got other groups I can review anyways!

Departure Single Review
- I've kind of missed reviewing Scandal. It's not my fault that they haven't released anything interesting lately! Departure had a music video, but it's just a live performance disguised as a music video with some decent angles. I don't know when Scandal's releasing their next single, so I figure I at least ought to review Departure. Besides, Scandal's already lined up to release another single in July. Before I know, they're going to be releasing their fifth album! Departure just has an A-side and a B-side, so reviewing it shouldn't be terribly challenging. The only difficult part is finding something to say about this single; I'm still very much on the fence about this review.

Family Party Single Review
- I'm not sure if I want to review the PV for Family Party, because that means I have to talk about the song in more detail. In contrast, if I review the entire single I can spend less time writing on just Family Party and more on Scanty Skimpy and Invader Invader -extended mix-. But then again, I probably could do a PV review for Family Party. It's weird enough, and thankfully it isn't terrible long either like Kizuitara Kataomoi was. Screencapping would be a breeze! I think what I'll do is re-listen to all the songs on Family Party. I've avoided the A-side like the plague and only listened to the other two B-sides once. I'll make a verdict after listening to all three again!

Final Dance/nerve PV/Single Review
- Me saying this will be my last review of something current from BiS just doesn't feel right. I haven't really gone into my feelings about their upcoming disbandment, but I'm think I'm in this weird state of denial right now. But after watching the PV for Final Dance it hit me that this is really happening. They're disbanding. So I am absolutely doing both a PV and single review of their last single. The Final Dance PV is already out, so I'll do that first then review the single either at the end of May or the beginning of June. Also I think the Nerve may get a new PV? I know the song's being recorded, and the Final Dance PV indicates a new PV for Nerve.

Juujika PV Review
- If there's one group I can always count on to release a quintessential summer PV, it's Tokyo Girls' Style. I mean, do you guys remember their last May single, Unmei? Such a great summer PV. And it looks like Juujika follows in the same vein of summer! In all seriousness, I am absolutely reviewing Tokyo Girls' Style's newest PV. There's a lot for me to talk about in it! I should also mention that I'll be reviewing the group's upcoming album, Killing Me Softly in June. I'd like to review Juujika before that though; I may also review the single, since it has all those song covers including Higurashi no Naku Koro ni by Shimamiya Eiko. I expect lots of creepiness.

Killer Killer EP Single Review
- I feel like just a few weeks ago I was reviewing Bellring Shoujo Heart's last single! I guess one of the nice things about an indie group is that they have slightly more frequent releases than some of the groups I follow. Seriously, a summer Perfume single? What the hell, UMJ, it's already been five months! But I digress. So yeah, I'm definitely reviewing Killer Killer EP, I enjoy Bellring Shoujo Heart's music, and seeing as they'll be pretty much the only alternative idol group I can review once BiS disbands... I figure I'd better get started on reviewing their stuff more frequently! Killer Killer EP was actually released in late April so I'll get to reviewing this soon!

Labrador Retriever PV Review
- I don't know about AKB48's newest A-side. I just don't know. I kind of wish I'd just recorded a reaction video the way Chiima used to on her Youtube channel, because I'm 99% certain my eyes popped out of their sockets. I don't want to say there's nothing I can talk about in the PV for Labrador Retriever, because there is. My god, there is. Labrador Retriever is being released later in the month, so I may review the PV around the time after a graduate and before the results of the Senbatsu election are revealed. Not that those are terribly important. I honestly could care less about the Senbatsu results this year, we all know who's going to win, so why does it matter?

Naitemo Iin da yo PV Review
- I may do a single review of this instead. I'm still debating. Because as much as I hate to admit it, I don't now if I can talk about much in the PV for Naitemo Iin da yo. Which is weird, because I usually never have that problem with Momoiro Clover Z PVs. But Naitemo Iin da yo's PV is strangely... not strange. I'd expect something like it from 9nine but Momoiro Clover Z? I'll explain more if I end up reviewing the PV. Even then, I'll briefly go over it in a single review of Naitemo Iin da yo. I think it depends on how much spare time I have this month. I'll have more in the second half of May so maybe if I get my writing juices flowing, I can write a proper review of this PV!

There tends to be a pretty consistent series of steps of being a music fan.

Step 1: you get into a band.
Step 2: you develop further appreciation for the band.
Step 3: you buy (or don't buy if you catch my drift) CDs by the band.
Step 4: you decide to go see the band in concert.

Depending on where you live, completing Step 4 tends to be harder than those first three.

Perfume performing many, many, many miles away from me.

In my life I have been to two concerts. One was Hillary Duff and I was seven, so I don't know if that counts. And for the record, she lip-synced. My second concert was more recent, and thankfully a lot closer than the Hilary Duff concert (that one was in Virginia, if I recall correctly). I don't know how it is in Europe, but in America, getting to a concert can be pilgrimage depending on where you live. If you live in a city, like Los Angeles or New York City, then it's a little bit easier. Bands are always performing in big cities, and at the smaller venues, you can get cheaper tickets. I paid $20 for the ticket to that second concert, and the venue was tiny (but pretty awesome since the band was right there). But I'm just talking about American (and sometimes Canadian and European) bands. Say you're a fan of an idol group. A Japanese idol group, since I have no idea how often South Korean idol groups perform internationally. Any international idol fan can tell you the struggles of being an international idol fan. Finding merch is difficult, accessing online content is difficult, and most difficult of all, seeing your idols in concert is... difficult!

What benefits are there to being an international fan? I mean, really, are there any? I guess you could say that an international fan has a different cultural perspective than a domestic fan, but how often does that come in handy? For a most people, being an international fan comes with more cons than it does pros. One of the most obvious being that it's incredibly difficult to see the groups you follow in concert. Your first option is flying to Japan and seeing them there, but that comes with it's own share of drawbacks. If I wanted to fly to Japan right now and see... say, Curumi Chronicle, it would cost me over $2,0000 for a round-trip flight. And that's just the flight. I'd have to find a place to stay, book a hotel, figure out means of transportation, and adjust to time zones. Did I mention the language barrier? Knowing even a little bit of Japanese can take a little bit stress off of navigating around a different country, but if you don't, that's only yet another setback. And Japanese is by no means an easy language to learn, especially if your first language is English. So when all that is said and done, is seeing your idols in Japan worth it? If you have the finances and cultural savvy, then maybe it is. But a lot of international fans don't have either one of those.

The alternate option for many international fans, myself included, is crossing our fingers and hoping an idol group flies somewhere near our vicinity. And typically, idols stick in Japan, especially more obscure idol groups like Bump.y and indie idol groups like Curumi Chronicle. It even took Perfume over a decade to perform somewhere internationally. I feel sorry for fans who live in really remote countries like New Zealand or Uruguay. I mean, have you ever heard an idol group perform in New Zealand? Or anywhere in South America/Australia/Africa for that matter? I've noticed that the three main areas that idols perform internationally are Europe, Asian countries outside of Japan like South Korea, and North America. It's Europe that gets many idol groups; for example, Babymetal and Berrikyuu are both set to perform in Europe this year. Of course, Europe is still a far away place for many international fans, but you know, baby steps. Obviously, the best bet for someone like me who doesn't even own a passport would for an idol group to come to the United States for a concert. But... there's still a problem with that. A big problem actually.

This is a map of the United States:


Now I don't know how many of you remember your geography facts, but the United States of America is the third largest country in the world. Having Alaska helps (thanks, Alaska!). I live in the southeast portion of that map. I won't say exactly where, just that I'm 100% certain General Sherman marched through my backyard at some point during the Civil War. Now New York is located in the northeastern part of the map near that tip at the top that is Maine, but not quite as close. It's the state that's kind of shaped like a Dorito. Unlike California which exists on the opposite coast (and it would take me 37 hours to drive to Los Angeles), New York is on the same side of the United States as I am. However, the drive from where I am to New York City would still be eight hours. I have road-tripped to Florida with my family, and let me tell you, I do not like it at all. Sitting in a car for hours on end is completely uncomfortable, and the only thing more uncomfortable than that is being the driver. The most I've driven without stopping is three hours, and that was exhausting. I can't even begin to imagine how tiring it would be to drive for eight hours. And then there are the tollbooths! Up north, there are so many tollbooths, especially if you want to get into New York City. When my aunt drove us into the city, I'm pretty sure she went through at least two or three to get to the Holland Tunnel.

My point is, if an artist "comes to the USA," that doesn't mean they're going to be any more accessible than they were thousands of miles away in Japan. It isn't like Europe where you can just hope from one country to another in a car. Seriously, if I drove a hundred miles north or south or west, I'd probably end up in a town that doesn't look much different from my own. The best bet any American fan has is living in one of the "hot spots" for performances. Those hot spots are pretty much just Los Angeles in California and New York City in New York. And maybe Chicago. So you either have to live ridiculously far out west or ridiculously far up north. If you live in the south or midwest? You're a sitting duck unless you know a kind soul who'd be willing to provide you with lodging out in one of those hot spots. And don't forget finding transportation! Conceptually, flying sounds like a great idea until you factor in the expensive prices, airport security, and overall sense of stress and misery comes with flying. Then if you do fly somewhere, you have to go through the whole process of renting a car, or finding some other miscellaneous method of getting to the concert venue. Traveling internationally is no walk in the park, but traveling within the United States isn't much easier. So sure, a J-pop artist may perform in the USA, but it may as well be in a different country.

However, the big question is... is it worth it?

For me, it's not. And maybe that's because I'm not in a position where I don't have the finances and independence to make my own decisions for myself. I'm not even in college yet! That doesn't mean there aren't concerts and idol-related events I don't want to go to. I'd gladly see BiS's final concert, but I'm not in the position to do so. Same goes for all the other idol groups that will very likely never perform in the United States. And even then, there are still idol events in the United States that I can't go to. For instance, I'd love to go to Idol Matsuri. An American convention dedicated to just idol stuff? I'm totally down for that! But it's in Washington, which is about as far away as I can get other than Hawaii or Alaska. Like I said, I'd love to go, but when I weigh out the pros and cons, rationally speaking, I just don't have the ability to make that happen. And that's why I won't be going to Morning Musume's concert in New York City. I've been to NYC before, but the time in which Momusu performs is just not convenient for me. Maybe someday in the future, when I'm out of school entirely and have a secure job (and who knows when that will be in this economy), I can make decisions about seeing idols in concert, if I still want to. I don't even know if the groups I like will still be around when I reach that point. So here I am, waiting and wondering.


Admittedly, it's not just Morning Musume's recent news that's gotten me musing about this topic. I've been thinking about it for a very long time regarding Perfume. I should say that if it was Perfume performing in New York City this October in lieu of Momusu, then I'd definitely go. Nothing against Momusu, but Perfume is a group that I've wanted to see live for a very long time. But even then, I'm not sure if I'd be able to. For Perfume to perform in New York at a reasonable time for me, the stars would practically have to align themselves. There would be so many variables that I'd have to take into question if I decided to go to New York and see Perfume, especially since I'd very likely be in college should they ever decide to grace the United States with their presence. And everything is out if they perform on the west coast. I love Perfume, but at the end of the day, I have to be responsible and practical when it comes to spending money and gas when I may need that someday for something else. I'm more than certain that there are Perfume fans all over the world in the same situation as me, who have even less of a chance of seeing Perfume live or any J-pop artists. It is the most frustrating thing to think of, but that's just how things are.

There are some days where it really drives me crazy. Why is it that some people have the luck of just driving a few miles to see their idols perform while the rest of us don't? But there is literally nothing I can do about it other than complain. And everyone gets tired of hearing other people complain, even if the complaints are rightly justified. Still, I get into these moods somedays where I can't shake this frustration of being stuck in one place and having no means of getting anywhere else. Obviously, it isn't just concerts that are on my mind when these stagnate days come around, but they most definitely don't help. I think what gets to me the most is that despite all my rationalizations, I still can't help but hold on to the hope of seeing Perfume or some other idol act in concert. When Perfume's management pulls stunts like holding a big announcement only to reveal another domestic tour, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a tad bit frustrated and miffed. I really don't know what Perfume's management is doing; it feels like they've been hinting at doing a concert in America, but nothing has really come of that. They've to Europe, but again, that's Europe. Still too far away. I wish they'd either make a decision or just forget about it, because it's not fair to international fans to hold out for a 3rd World Tour that may never even happen.

Moral of the story is that science needs to get cracking on instant teleportation (and while we're at it, same goes for establishing Starfleet). If you are one of the fans with the opportunity to see Morning Musume this October, don't let me rain on your parade. I am completely happy for you, and you should be happy too. But I if I could ask one thing of you, please appreciate the concert. Don't just appreciate the performances from the girls themselves, but appreciate the fact that you got to do something that many other fans will very likely never be able to do. And write about it! I do very much enjoy reading blog posts about concerts!

The first week of spring where I live felt nothing like spring. It was cold, rainy, disgusting, and generally miserable. Actually, most of April was cold, rainy, and disgusting. Thankfully, the weather has finally warmed up in May, and it actually feels like spring! I guess you could say May has been my... Second Spring.


Look guys, it's Curumi Chronicle! Above we see her jamming out to what is probably her own music, because she has some pretty awesome music. You know what's so nice about following Curumi Chronicle? She has a great international fanbase. When I say that I mean she has an active international fanbase. It's so hard to follow indie idols, but there are so many translations of her interviews, songs, release information, etc. that it makes following her much easier! Which is good because I think Curumi Chronicle is slowly becoming one of my favorite idols to write about on the Wonderland. I loved her debut album (it got five apples!), and I love her general sound. What do you expect? She's a technopop idol in the vein of Perfume, of course that's right up my alley! I think her and Kus Kus can fill the void in my heart when Perfume disbands (that is if Kus Kus sticks with being an electropop unit). Anyways, Curumi's latest release is an EP appropriately titled Second Spring EP. I don't know what happened to the First Spring, but Second Spring EP has been out for about a month now. It's been at the top of my single review list for now, and I think it's long overdue that I give Curumi Chronicle's first single post-album a proper review. And as for you, reader, you should listen to Second Spring EP! If you want. Your choice. I can't make you do anything... oh well, onto the review!

Covers/Outfits

Nothing much to say about the cover. It's probably a still taken from one of Curumi's concerts and then they just added her name in the bottom right corner. Curumi Chronicle's about as indie as a technopop idol can get, so I don't expect anything too intricate for her single covers. So yeah, nothing special, but Curumi looks very into it on the cover. Like she's jamming out to her own music, and we should all join her! I'll be a Curumi Chronicle concert is awesome. It's probably really small and intimate, with quality music blasting through the speakers and- okay, back on topic. Covers are fine, outfit is fine, everything is fine so let's get to the songs!!

Prismic Step

I actually listened to a preview of Prismic Step before Second Spring EP was released, that and a full rip of one other song on this single. At the time, I was kind of underwhelmed by Prismic Step. I didn't hate the song, but it didn't leave a lasting impression on me, just vague positivity. But in hindsight, I think that was because it was just the chorus. The full song is better! Prismic Step is one of Curumi Chronicle's brighter technopop songs, kind of like Make New World and Twinkle linkle line. Prismic Step has the same Dubstep bits subtly placed behind the verses that Make New World also had. Oddly enough, I didn't find it to be that gratuitous, the same way I did for Make New World. Do Curumi's producers have some weird voodoo magic that makes their Dubstep breaks not awkward and forced? Beyond the Dubstep, Prismic Step is a really fun song that shows off the more idol side of Curumi Chronicle. I think if she wanted to, she could perform an acoustic version of this song and have it still sound pretty similar. Of course, in its original form, Prismic Step is still pretty neat. I do wonder what Prismic Step is though... I mean, I can' even find the word "prismic" in the dictionary.

Although I do like Prismic Step, I still don't latch on to it quite as strongly as the two other original songs on Second Spring EP. It's a fine song and everything, and a lovely piece of technopop, but there's something very... ordinary about it? I don't want to say it's generic but it's... it sounds a lot like Saori@destiny. Saori@destiny was a technopop artist (and a good one at that), and Curumi's gotten a lot of comparisons to her and other former technopop artist Aira Mitsuki. She's mainly been compared to the latter for being about as street idol as a technopop artist can get. I read that Curumi actually got kind of upset when she got compared to Saori@destiny, because she wanted to be seen as an individual performer and not the shadow of someone else. Which is a completely fair statement, but I bring this up because... I could totally hear Saori@destiny releasing Prismic Step. Or Aira Mitsuki. Which again, doesn't mean that Prismic Step is a bad song. But when I listen to it, I feel like I'm listening to a reincarnation of Saori@destiny. And that feeling is kind of surreal. But comparisons aside, I still like Prismic Step, even if it isn't my favorite song off this single. It's a fun, idol-y song!



So I think I'll give Prismic Step four and half apples! It really is a cute little song, with a bunch of fun little technopop sound effects and earnestly happy vocals. Admittedly, it's not the strongest I've heard from Curumi Chronicle, but on Second Spring EP, Prismic Step is still a pretty sweet song. And hey, it sounds like it came from the future! I love futuristic music!

Orange

Orange was the only song I hadn't heard beforehand on Second Spring EP; everything else I'd either heard the full song or a preview. So Orange was kind of the wild card on this single. All I knew was the that song was a little over five minutes, and I deduced that very like Orange was a ballad. Maybe a ballad about oranges! Orange is a ballad, but sadly it has nothing to do with fruit. The lyrics of Orange are very nice though, sad too. Check them out at the bottom of this lyrics page. Actually, follow that blog if your'e a Tumblr user. Sidling away from that plug-in, Orange is a pretty simple song about having a crush on someone but not being able to tell them, let alone approach them. But the way the lyrics are written projects such a strong feeling of loneliness combined with sadness. It adds such a nice layer to the song! I've always had a very divided opinion on ballads, but I will admit, I'm a little more lenient when it comes to techno ballads. I'm not sure why that is, but maybe it's because of my fondness for techno music. And in techno ballads, I feel like there's more... exploration musically? With regular ballads, the music is usually very stripped down (with exceptions of course). But in techno ballads, the instrumental isn't necessarily barren, just more downbeat and different.

Orange is a ballad that uses one of my favorite musical techniques: a lengthy crescendo. I don't know what it is about a long crescendo, but that slow buildup always gives me chill bumps! And Orange has such a lovely crescendo that's perfectly timed. The song is over five minutes and it uses those five minutes well, building as each verse and chorus passes until the end of the song is blooming with beautiful instrumental effects. That's something else I love about Orange; it has a really great musical atmosphere. Is that the right way to describe it? There's just something very enchanting about the sound of Orange, like something you'd hear in a dream. The little sound effects between each chorus and verse are my favorite parts. They invoke images of sparkles and rain... I'm not sure why those two specifics images come to my mind, but they do! Orange actually reminds me a lot of Rainy Starry Night, a song from Curumi's self-titled debut album. Both songs have that very soothing, ambient sound. For such a pretty song, Orange really is quite sad though. I keep rereading the lyrics and each time I re-read a verse, I can't help but think of how sad the song is. But it's sad in the prettiest way possible. I really love this song; it's definitely one of my favorites on this single.



I gotta give Orange five apples. It's rare that I find a ballad I really like, and Orange is so very pretty. I want to gaze at stars listening to this song, or sleep under a tree, or do something that sounds idyllic in my head. Definitely give this one a listen, especially if you're in the mood for something calm.

Kitty

Mmmmm~ I love this song. You know how there are some songs you listen to, and you just feel better when they're playing through your earbuds? Yeah, that's what Kitty is. Between this and Orange, I can't decide what my favorite track on Second Spring EP is. I think I have to go with Kitty though, just by a margin. Kitty has such a... distinct sound. I don't think I've heard another Curumi Chronicle song I can compare it to. Kitty was the first song I heard of all the tracks on this EP, and immediately I latched on to it. You'd think a song like Kitty would sound pretty adorable, but it's actually more of a dance song. It'll probably get a remix at some point, this one or Prismic Step! The weird thing about Kitty is that it's not... a super dance-y song. Like it's not dance-y in the way you'd think a technopop song would be dance-y. It's nowhere near as hard as technopop dance tracks like The Music, Edge, Galaxy Boy, etc. But when I listen to Kitty, I still want to dance to it. Weirdly enough, Kitty reminds me of an 80s dance track. There's something about the melody in the instrumental that makes me think of Madonna, and I'm not completely sure what that is. I also get a little bit of a Perfume no Okite vibe from Kitty, just a little bit though.

So yeah, Kitty isn't a dance song in the same way that some of Curumi's other songs are, like 16 feat. Usagi Disco or her unreleased song Voice feat. Usagi Disco. Come to think of it, any of her Usagi Disco remixes tend to be dance songs. Anyways, Kitty is very quirky. That's the best way I can describe it. Vocally, it's nothing too new for Curumi. But the arrangement is very different from Curumi's past songs. Something about the transitions and just overall structure. I'm not sure how to properly explain without a proper music background. Just to my ears, Kitty sounds quirky. That's why I like the song so much! I don't think I'll ever hear another song like Kitty from Curumi Chronicle, or at least I hope I won't. I wonder how Kitty sounds when Curumi performs it live. I wonder that about a lot of Curumi Chronicle songs, but particularly so with Kitty. For such a short song, I think Kitty is a lot of fun. There are a lot of distinct, memorable parts in it, like the opening instrumental, the entire chorus, the English, and especially that kickass instrumental break in the middle. That reminds me of a Purity Ring song for some reason... Overall, for reasons I can't quite fully explain, I think Kitty is a freaking awesome song. I will definitely jam to this frequently.



Big surprise, Kitty gets five apples. This is such a neat song that's like half dance song and half idol song. The final result is something that works really well. My explanation is not doing Kitty justice, so just go listen to the song if you haven't done so already. I think the entire song up on Curumi's Youtube channel so there it is! And while you're at it, you can subscribe to Curumi Chronicle as well!

Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usgai Disco Remix)

The next-to-last song off Second Spring EP is the Usagi Disco Remix of Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo. Now I love the original Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo; it's one of my favorite songs off of Curumi's debut album. What made the song so neat is that it was such a nice combination of a electronic dance and cutesy idol pop. Usagi Disco produces much of Curumi's music, most notably producing 16 feat. Usagi Disco and Gozen Juuichi Ji (Usagi Disco Remix) off her debut album and a currently unreleased song called Voice. No, not Perfume's Voice, Curumi's Voice is much better than Perfume's. Some of those songs were the highlights from Curumi Chronicle, and I'll be gobsmacked if Voice doesn't get a release at some point. I was a little skeptical of a remix of a song that I already found to be perfect the way it was. However, Usagi Disco's previous work with Curumi lead me to be optimistic about the remix of Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo. Maybe Usagi Disco could utilize the dance elements of Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo and extend them in his remix, kind of what Nakata did with Perfume's edge and Spring of Life. So did Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usagi Disco Remix) turn out to be a memorable remix?

Well... not exactly. Not at all, actually.

Look, I'm not against remixing a song. I know that artists do it all the time with their own songs, and I have listened to some very awesome remixes. But I just can't get into Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usagi Disco Remix). It cuts out a lot of my favorite parts, including the adorable instrumental opening; the song just goes straight into the chorus. Surprisingly Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usagi Disco Remix) is slower than the original Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo. Which isn't a terrible musical decision... that can work! But again, what I liked about the original song was how upbeat and cheerful it was. This Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo feels more like a dance song than it does an idol song. And a lot of Curumi Chronicle songs get that same vibe, but the thing is, the original song is so much more idol-y. There are some pretty cool dance breaks in this remix, but again, they don't feel like they match up with the rest of the song. I get what Usagi Disco was trying to do by changing the style of Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo, but personally, I think his changes take away what made the original such a great song. Listening to Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usagi Disco Remix) just makes me want to listen to the original song. In fact, I think I'll go listen to the original right now!



I'll give Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usagi Disco Remix) three apples, partially because at its core, the original song is amazing. The remix isn't a total trashing of the original mix, but it doesn't exactly enhance Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo. I guess if you wanted to play this song at a party it would work better? For me though, I'm sticking with the original.

Kuruikuru (Fenotasu Remix)

And finally the last song on this EP is... another remix! Yay. Hopefully, it'll be better than Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usagi Disco Remix). This remix is of Kuruikuru, another song off of Curumi's debut album. Kuruikuru was another strong song off of Curumi Chronicle, mainly for being such a fast-paced energetic song. It was catchy too! I was hoping that the remix would keep the same high speed of the original Kuruikuru, and I think for the most part, it does. But I also feel like the instrumentation is changed a lot in the Fenotasu Remix of Kuruikuru. The original was more a dance-pop song, but this remix sounds a lot more like Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo. The original one, not the Usagi Disco Remix. It's really hard for me to properly explain the differences between Kuruikuru and the Fenotasu Remix. It's like the instrumental was trimmed down and then lighter sounds were added to it. I even heard an acoustic guitar at one point in this remix. I guess I'd say Kuruikuru (Fenotasu Remix) isn't as... loud as the original? I'm not sure that's the right word? It's like the remix is more organic.

But which of the two works better? I admit I like Kuruikuru's remix better than I did Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo's. But like with Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo, I didn't really need a remix of Kuruikuru. I think the original is just fine, great actually! The original is so energetic and upbeat. I do like that Kuruikuru keeps the same vocal structure as the original. And the changes made to the song aren't bad ones; I do like that Kuruikuru (Fenotasu Remix) has a more technopop sound than it does EDM. But while the changes to Kuruikuru aren't bad ones, I do kind of miss the sound of the original. Again, I love the original version. But if I were to judge Kuruikuru (Fenotasu Remix) on its own, without bearing in mind that it's a remix, I still think that it's an enjoyable song. It's just as fun an upbeat, and it does showcase the more idol-y side of Curumi's musical style. I think it's all a matter of personal taste; if you like the more idol side of Curumi's music, then the Fenotasu Remix of Kuruikuru may appeal to you more than the original. I guess my own final verdict on Kuruikuru (Fenotasu Remix) is mixed to positive? It's decent as far as remixes go.



So I guess I'll go with 3.5 apples. I still like the original Kuruikuru better than the Fenotasu Remix, but I did enjoy listening to the remix. Will I listen to it much in the future? Probably not. But if it comes up on shuffle in my music library, it's not like I'll skip it!

The Verdict

So that was Curumi Chronicle's first single after her debut album, and I think for the most part, it holds up pretty well. I think the biggest weakness of the single was that it probably didn't need to be an EP. Second Spring EP could have just had Prismic Step, Orange, and Kitty on it and still would have been a strong release. Maybe an even stronger release. The two remixes of Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo and Kuruikuru aren't exactly unwanted, but for me, they don't add much to the EP. Kagayake Sorairo Shoujo (Usagi Disco Remix) is particularly unnecessary when the original song is in my opinion, better than this remix. Kuruikuru (Fenotasu Remix) holds up slightly better, but at the end of the day, I'm still going to listen to the original more than the remix. Maybe I'm just a stickler for original songs. But then again, I've heard some really good remixes... is it just my own personal taste? I guess I like a remix better when I feel like the best parts of a song are being enhanced, not changed or flat-out removed. And in the remixes on Second Spring EP, it feels like one or the other is being done to both the original songs. So the final result is different, but not necessarily better. I wouldn't say the two remixes aren't terrible, but neither one really impressed me.

However, the original songs on Second Spring EP did. Even Prismic Step, the weakest of the three songs, was still a really good song. What I like about Prismic Step, Orange, and Kitty is that they're all different from each other. Prismic Step is bubbly technopop, Orange is a calm ballad, and Kitty is a catchy dance track. Each on has its own individual strengths and adds something to the single. None of them feel like filler tracks, unlike the two remixes. Prismic Step is such a contagiously happy song, in the vein of Saori@destiny's earlier work or Aira Mitsuki's. In contrast, Orange is a ballad with surprisingly sad lyrics and gorgeous composition. And finally, Kitty is the quirky dance track that I could totally see being played at a club. A very fun club that plays Japanese technopop. Together, these three songs make up the best of Second Spring EP. Overall though, this is still a good single, with or without the remixes. Like I said before, there isn't exactly an abundance of technopop idols on the market right now. I mean, there is Kyarypamyupamyu but... that's Kyary. Curumi Chronicle's Second Spring EP offers the same variety of technopop that made her album such an enjoyable listen. I've been jamming to all the songs on this single since it was released, and I highly recommend you should too!


Second Spring EP gets four apples from me. Even at its weaker points, this is still a strong technopop release, and pretty much the only thing other than Kyary right now that I can review. But seriously, can Voice get a release already? That song is golden. Even at is weakest points, Second Spring EP is still a good single, and I highly recommend listening to it if you haven't done so already. And if you're into technopop acts like Aira Mitsuki and Saori@destiny, check Curumi Chronicle! Unlike those two, she hasn't dropped off the face of the planet. Not yet at least. Let's hope it stays that way!

Okay, can someone explain to me what the hell is going on with Momoiro Clover Z?

It's like just when I decided to get into them, just when I decided to open up my heart and enjoy MomoClo, shrieking voices and all, they got... boring.


I mean, look at that single cover, that looks like something Dorothy Little Happy would release, not Momoiro Clover Z. Do you guys remember how when I last reviewed Momoiro Clover Z, I talked about how I was a little skeptical of all the criticism of them declining in quality? Well... those criticizers may have been right. The Momoiro Clover Z of today is definitely from the Momoiro Clover Z of the Battle and Romance era. But different doesn't always mean bad! Even idol groups can evolve (albeit it's probably a lot more calculated) and change their style, and that's clearly what's been going on with Momoiro Clover Z. The only problem is they're evolving into a much more toned down, smooth-around-the-edges group. The best and worst part of Momoiro Clover Z is how chaotic they are. Sure, their vocals sound like nails on a chalkboard, but musically speaking, their songs are always so chaotically entertaining, that it's kind of endearing. That and their weird, nonsensical music videos were what made MomoClo eventually grow on me. After I reviewed 5th Dimension, their follow-up single, Gounn had a great music video, but the song was a little boring. Now here we are at Naitemo Iin da yo.

And by god, this song is boring.

I have one simple rule when it comes to music: don't bore me. Oh, don't get me wrong, a terrible song is a terrible song. Hello Kitty by Avril Lavigne is a terrible song. But at least it's memorable. At least it leaves an impression on me, even if it's one of disgust and irritation. When I listen to music, I do it to evoke feelings and ideas, and a boring song doesn't do that. Naitemo Iin da yo is a boring song. It sounds like it's going to be epic a la Neo Stargate in the beginning, and even into the verse, but that's a sucker punch into a chorus so generic you could swap it with an AKB48 chorus. The thing is I feel like there are parts where Naitemo Iin da yo could be a really great song. Like there's this surprisingly cool saxophone break in the bridge between the second and last chorus. And there are parts of the song that carry this feeling of epicness, like the opening. But that potential is squandered by the fact that the chorus and verses of Naitemo Iin da yo sound like they came from two different songs. And the chorus, what is usually the biggest, most memorable part of your typical pop song is so generic. Okay, it's not the most generic thing I have heard, but it is the most generic thing I have heard from Momoiro Clover Z. This is the group that had Pinky Jones, Wani to Shampoo, Mugen no Ai for crying out loud! Hearing them sound this boring is... like being in an episode of The Twilight Zone.

Maybe the reason Naitemo Iin da yo is so mundane is because it's the theme song for a movie. And you know, movie themes can be hit or miss! Like Perfume compromised their technopop sound for the ridiculously light and kid-friendly Mirai no Museum or as I like to call it, The Doraemon Song. Naitemo Iin da yo is the theme song for Akumu-chan: The Movie or in English, My Little Nightmare: The Movie. Now MomoClo previously did the theme song for the television show the movie is based off of; that song turned out to be Saraba, Itoshiki Kanashimitachi-yo. Which is a good song. So this still doesn't make any sense! And from the summary I read on Wikipedia, Akumu-chan seems like a pretty neat television show. It sounds like it's got drama, action, fantasy, horror, the kind of television show where the stakes are high! I don't know if that's true, but Naitemo Iin da yo doesn't sound like the kind of song that brings to my mind drama, action, fantasy, or horror. I don't know what to make of this song. It isn't good, it isn't bad, it isn't weird, it isn't anything that I'd expect from Momoiro Clover Z. So yes, Naitemo Iin da yo is different for MomoClo, but only because it is so painfully normal for them.

The thing is... the girls don't actually sound that bad in Naitemo Iin da yo. One of MomoClo's weak points has always been their vocals, but here they sound pretty decent. The squeak comes back at certain points (like the chorus), but individually, they all sound frighteningly passable. Even Kanako and Ayaka's voices aren't anywhere near as cacophonic as they've been in some of their previous songs. I mean, don't get me wrong, the vocals aren't anywhere near as good as say, Tokyo Girls' Style's or Fairies. But for Momoiro Clover Z, they're... better. And that scares me too. But despite the fact that the girls of MomoClo sound not-terrible in Naitemo Iin da yo, they don't have enough vocal power to pull off the truly epic song that Naitemo Iin da yo is trying to pass itself off as. You need someone like Mizuki Nana, she's got the pipes to pull off cheesy epic anime songs. Momoiro Clover Z does not. I don't now, I don't know what else I can really say about Naitemo Iin da yo other than it's big pile of nothing. There's nothing that stands out about it other than the fact that for Momoiro Clover Z it is embarrassingly normal. I don't now what the hell happened with Momoiro Clover Z on this single, but whatever it is, I hope it gets fixed by the time their next release rolls around.

Oh well, if there's something I can count on with Momoiro Clover Z, it's a weird, interesting PV. Even though Gounn was an average song, it had a really cool, fascinating PV that was fun to pick apart. And the promotional images for Naitemo Iin da yo look pretty cool. Maybe the PV will involve underwater sea goddesses or something crazy like that. Just something to make the song interesting... anything... oh god, please let the PV for Naitemo Iin da yo be interesting.


Okay, a futuristic room... that can be interesting. Now utilize it!


Wow, they're showing us a clip from Akumu-chan: The Movie! Boy, I didn't know Momoiro Clover Z was being featured in it!


Why are they all dressed like Christmas presents? It's a little early for their holiday PV.


So MomoClo's now doing underwater rituals in Wonderland. Okay then.


And now we're underwater! What happened to that futuristic room???


This is Kitagawa Keiko, main character of the Akumu-chan series. She also appeared in a TV Special as the 6th member of MomoClo.


And this is her costar, Kimura Manatsu.


Why are they in this music video? Why do you think, to promote the movie of course.


Okay, these outfits looked a little bit cooler in the promo pic. Here, they look very costume-y.


Boy, I didn't know that clouds and the sun existed underwater! This is mind-blowing!


There's a lot of power-posing in this dance. I can't complain, it makes screencapping easier!


For a PV by Momoiro Clover Z set underwater not much is happening.


Okay, new dance shot, I guess that's different-


Wait a minute, is that the dance set from Shabondama!?


Oh look, these two again. Still running, I see. From what? Who knows!


MomoClo, what are you doing here!? Go back to the sea!


I admit these close-ups are prettier but very... serious. And normal. And not-weird.


Mmkay, now they're singing at school. Great. Very interesting.


Ooh, now they're running through a school. And it's raining. Dunno why. Don't really care why either.


Now I'm not a professional writer, but in common storytelling, if you want to draw you audience in it helps to show what your characters are running from.


Can we get like a giant octopus in this shot or something?


Do these two ever take a break from running!? Surely they need a water break by now!


Oh good, they finally made it out of that building. Because I was so invested.


Who the hell are these kids?


What the hell is MomoClo doing here?


Why the hell did they steal Perfume's apples?


How the hell are- oh, forget it.


Ah, I contributed nothing to this PV. Now give me an Oscar!


We contributed nothing to our own PV. Now give us a #1 single already!


So... was this all a dream?


Thank you, future room, for serving no purpose other than to bookend the PV!

What in the wide world of sports did I just watch? This PV is confusing. Not confusing in the fun, "I have no idea what's going on but I'm having fun!" confusing. In fact, I wish the PV for Naitemo Iin da yo was confusing in that way. At least that would be more entertaining! I am not sure what the producers were trying to convey with Naitemo Iin da yo. When I saw the promotional image released, I thought that the PV would be underwater-themed. And it was. Kind of. But man, that idea was really underused. I mean, you can do so much with an underwater environment. And the way MomoClo's PVs can take concepts and twist them into the craziest directions, I thought they'd do the same thing for Naitemo Iin da yo. But the underwater setting is pretty much only used for the dance shot. The rest of the PV is devoted to either showing the girls in a school building, the two main characters from the movie, or the girls dancing in an other water-esque set. How are any of these scenes connected? Does it have something to do with water? What about the futuristic set in the beginning and that weird ritual with the apples? Why does nothing make sense in such a boring way? I practically need an instruction manual to figure out what means what in this PV.

Would watching the Akumu-chan drama help me figure this PV out? I know the basic summary of the drama is that Kitagawa Keiko is this teacher who's really apathetic until this new student played by Kimura Manatsu. And this new student dreams of terrible events set to happen in the future. So the teacher and student spend the series trying to prevent these disasters from happening. And that is a really cool concept. Maybe the drama is better than the PV. Actually, it probably is. The PV for Naitemo Iin da yo is all over the place. I think if the producers wanted to include the main actresses from the PV, they should have either minimized the scenes with MomoClo in them, or just create two separate PVs, one featuring the actresses and their story and the other featuring MomoClo. Trying to interweave these two together makes the final result jumbled and clunky. I kind of get the beginning where the two actresses are sleeping, since that ties in to the concept of the drama. But everything else? Why are they running through hallways all the time? What does MomoClo have to do with any of this? What's the point of having the girls be underwater? Does that tie into the lyrics? Are the other students at the end cast members of the show? I feel like this PV was just a big giant ploy to get me to watch the show and buy tickets to see the movie. Which I can't anyways because I don't live in Japan.

What could have made the PV for Naitemo Iin da yo cooler would be more supernatural elements. For a PV that features the girls dancing underwater, everything is surprisingly mundane. The only really surreal part is the ritual at the beginning with the apples then the girls showing up at the end with those apples appearing on that giant tree. And yet there are a bunch of really cool ideas that are shown in this PV, but none of them are ever explored or utilized to their fullest potential. Like that futuristic room in the beginning. We never see that again until the end of the PV. Why did they feel the need to include that room? Then it shows the teacher and student running, but what are they running from? Why are they running? I get that this is a PV and that they don't always wrap everything up in a sensical way, but if you're gonna throw out these ideas, then I'm gonna expect some kind of explanation behind why. But instead, a lot of these interesting ideas, like showing MomoClo running through a classroom in the rain, are just glazed over so we can get to the next idea that won't be fully explored. I'm not sure if Naitemo Iin da yo was trying to tell a story or just incorporate elements from the drama into the PV. Either way, the final result is a meandering mess.

What made Gounn such a fun PV was that all the imagery in it felt like it was there for a reason. The PV revolved around Buddhism, so the PV was rife with Buddhist imagery. I think Naitemo Iin da yo had a better budget than some of MomoClo's older PVs, but their older PVs at least explored concepts in a cohesive manner. I'd rather take something like Mirai Bowl or Mugen no Ai over Naitemo Iin da yo. When you come down to it, do the girls really do anything in this PV other than dance? Okay, they sit down at desks and run through rain and perform a ritual but other than that, what else do they do in this PV other than dance and look pretty in their close-ups? I can't see any of the girls' personalities in this PV. They're all so generically serious. And maybe that's because the song is serious, or because they're not given any opportunities to utilize their personalities. You could have switched them out with any other idol group, and I wouldn't have been able to tell the difference. In the end, I don't know what to make of the PV for Naitemo Iin da yo any more than I do the song. There are some visual effects that are cool, but visuals don't make up for the aimless storyline, lack of MomoClo-ness, and general feeling that I'm watching a prolonged advertisement for Akumu-chan: The Movie.


All in all, Naitemo Iin da yo feels like wasted potential. Two-and-a-half apples of wasted potential. I don't know what Momoiro Clover Z was going for with this PV, but I felt like I was reviewing a different idol group. Maybe they'll get a better single next time.

Everything sounds better in space. Perfume in Space. Idols in Space. Nia's Wonderland in Space. I'm not surprised that Morning Musume's used space for so many of their PVs!


Think about it. The music videos for Renai Revolution 21, The Manpower, Mikan, Kono Chikyuu Heiwa wo Honki de Negatterun da yo! and now Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe all feature space concepts.  I think Tsunku must have quite a thing for space. Although I think Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe definitely goes the farthest with the whole space schtick! Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe is the most recent A-side of the Colorful Era of Morning Musume and- oh, what's that? You're wondering what I think about Password is 0? Well... I only have one thing I really need to say about Password is 0:

• Tie-in! Tie-in! Tie-in! This song's a tie-in! Tie-in! Tie-in! Tie-in! This song's a tie-in! And there you go, now let's talk about Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe.

Let's talk about Platinum Era Morning Musume for a moment. You guys all remember the Platinum Era, right? Well, guess what? I don't! I wasn't a fan during the Platinum Era! Technically, that isn't true. I was a fan of Platinum Era Momusu for about a month, around the release of Onna to Otoko no Lullaby Game. Then Kamei Eri, Junjun, and Linlin graduated before I could get a chance to know them, and then four new girls that we all know and love (or hate) today were added to the group. Either way, Platinum Era was over. While I wasn't a fan around the time all the Platinum Era songs were released, I did become a fan of Morning Musume when they were in that in-between period between the triple graduation and the 9th generation. They weren't releasing any new material due to auditions and being a 5-member group, so I had to immerse myself in all their recent singles. This meant listening to all their Platinum Era songs and before and then getting complete and total whiplash when they released Maji Desu ka Ska! Then they went back to Platinum Era sound with Only You. Morning Musume was quite confusing before Tsunku turned them into an electropop unit.

What I remember most prominently about the Platinum Era was that everyone was sick of it by the time Eri, Junjun, and Linlin graduated. I remember reading several lengthy editorials about how Momusu's sound had gotten monotonous and depressing and the hope that adding the 9th Generation would give some life to the stagnancy period that had been dubbed, "Emo Musume." This was all before the Colorful Era really started, in that in-between period where we got such memorable songs like PyokoPyoko Ultra and Only You. Yes, what classic gems those were, so much that one of them is even Momusu's lowest-selling single! By the time One Two Three rolled around, people were praising it for being a refreshing change of sound into electropop. And there were also just as many people complaining about this new sound. With any idol group or music artist in general, the complaints did not go away. As each new Morning Musume single rolled around with no signs of switching from the electropop dance sound of One Two Three, more and more fans started complaining about how all the songs sounded the same, and that Morning Musume needed a change and you know where I'm going with this.

And then something weird happened. People started... liking the Platinum Era.

Now obviously this is the Nostalgia Principle coming into play, a term that I absolutely didn't just make up five seconds ago. The Nostalgia Principle simply states that if a piece of media ends, and you give it a certain period of time, then regardless of its quality, people will come to appreciate it in a new light. When I read people waxing poetic about the Platinum Era, it's usually for the lineup or the level of talent that is not present in the current Morning Musume. And sometimes it's even for the more mature, serious music.  Point is, I don't see anywhere near as many people complaining about the Platinum Era as I used to. But hey, Nostalgia Principle! So why do I bring all this up then? Well, it was only a matter of time before Tsunku decided to revisit the more serious, melancholic sound of Platinum Era songs. As fun as some of Colorful Era Momusu's songs have been, none of them have really been that serious or depressing. They've all been fun, upbeat, catchy dance numbers except The Matenrou Show. But nobody remembers that A-side anyways. Well, finally here to satisfy fans craving the Platinum sound of Morning Musume with the current lineup is Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe. It's moody, it's serious, it's Platinum Era Morning Musume with a little more Autotune. And honestly? It works really well.

I think Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe is one of my favorite A-sides that I've reviewed from Morning Musume. Even more than Brainstorming. I love catchy electropop dance songs as much as the next person, but do you know what I also love? Space. I love dark, dreamy songs singing about the cosmos and fate. To put things in perspective, I love One Room Disco, but give me Seventh Heaven and I will be entranced. Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe translates to Beyond Time and Space, and it totally lives up to that title. What I like most about Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe though is that it isn't just a rehash of something you'd hear from the Platinum Era. Sure, that opening violin and piano are very Platinum-esque, but then the electropop sound effects come in and the song becomes this really nice mesh between the sounds of the Platinum Era and Colorful Era. Even then, it nowhere near as Autotuned as some of the earlier Colorful Era music. And I really like the lyrics of Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe as well. They're not profoundly deep or anything, but compared to the odd lyrics of some Morning Musume songs, Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe's lyrics are very refined. The girls are just singing about the boundaries of space and time preventing two people from being together until they ascend to a higher plane of existence. Always a fun concept!

And do you know what else I like about Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe? Unlike Platinum Era songs, Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe doesn't rely on four girls to sing the entire song. In fact, most of this song is just duets and trios, with maybe one or two solos from Riho and Sayumi. The pitch of this song is a bit higher than some of the group's past A-sides, but no one sounds like they're trying to force out all these high notes. Even Riho's ad-libbing in the last chorus works so much better than when she ad-libbed in One Two Three. That's because she's not trying to belt out notes she can't hit, but instead just letting the notes go straight to her head voice. So she sounds a lot better, and her voice fits with the tone of the song. And everyone else in Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe sounds nice as well. This is just a nice song in general. Now I wouldn't want Morning Musume to go down the same road they went in Platinum Era and continue releasing serious songs like this one. I don't think they will either. But part of me does wonder what would happen if Momusu stuck with this style of music. I'm certain everyone would get tired of it as they have with their current music. Either way, Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe was nice diversion into something that isn't just upbeat electronic music. So yeah, I like it. I like it a lot.

So is the PV for Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe worth watching? Admittedly, Morning Musume's PVs lately haven't been anywhere near as cheap as UFP could be making them (just look at S/mileage to see what I mean). But is Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe's PV as journey through space and time, warping us into space, the final frontier? I don't know, but I'm gonna see how many space puns I can make!


Aw yes, look at that. Stars. Space. This PV is gonna be awesome.


Look! They're playing an imaginary piano! And quite poorly I might add. Their fingering is horrendous!


And Sayu's playing an invisible violin! But do you hold them that high? I mean-


Oooooooh... space...


It's so... colorful... and sparkly... and cosmic... wow...


Right! Focus! Um... the girls outfits look nice? Very flowy and celestial.


Actually, all the girls look really pretty in this music video. The styling is great!


And the little orbs are nice too! Are they meant to be planets?


Haruna's a spacebender! I knew it!


Dayum. Okay, Sayumi may not be the cutest idol in Morning Musume, but man alive, she is the hottest.


Wow, I just realized they're dancing barefoot. I don't think they've done that since Onna ni Sachi Are!


You know what these outfits need? Capes. I mean, the girls are already striking Superman poses, you may as well add the capes!


It's like they're dancing on the moon surrounded by the 8 planets! And Pluto. Can't forget Pluto!


Yay, more pretty close-ups!


Seriously, these are beautiful. They're all so starry and ethereal!


Oh wait, changed my mind, these are even prettier.


I don't care if it's all green screen, it's gorgeous.


For all the intensive, formation-heavy dances, Momusu's been doing lately, this one's pretty chill.


Ooh, the sky turned red! Like the Red Rectangle Nebula!


I have no idea why, but this dance break reminds me of the firebending ritual from Avatar: The Last Airbender. Only in space.


Oh yes, more space. Give me all the space.


God, I love space. I love that this PV has space. So much space.


I mean, look at that. How can anyone not find that enthralling!?


Yes, it's all special effects, but it's idols. IN SPACE.



I think I'm supposed to be adding witty commentary on this screencap...


...but honestly, I just wanna screencap all these pictures and stare at them.


So yeah... um... insert commentary here.


Insert another comment about how pretty everyone looks.


They're like one big giant star of idols and sparkles.


Gosh darn it... you win this round, UFP... you win...

Space. The final frontier. And the one concept that never ever ever gets old with me. I don't now what it is about space that makes it so fascinating to me. I think it's the idea that there are all these different galaxies and nebulas and planets that we haven't even visited. But we know that somewhere out there in this solar system and beyond are places that sound like they can't even exist. The incredible thing is that they do. I think what sucks me into space is the knowing it's infinite. There are worlds and places that we haven't even discovered yet. And there's also something about not being able to access most of space, that in my lifetime it will very likely always be a distant but real concept. That is what I really love about space. So a music video that's space-themed? I am all for that. Even cheap music videos that are space-themed, I'm still all over them. I just love seeing various concepts of space, because the ways in which it can be presented are so infinite. You can go into the science fiction aspect like in Star Trek or Star Wars or Battlestar Galactica, or you can just present the sheer aesthetic of space. All those stars and moons and unexplored planets. Space is both intimidating and engrossing.

And that is what makes me love the PV for Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe so much.

I will go ahead and say that it is not the most groundbreaking or elaborate or innovative music video I have ever reviewed. It isn't. There is no story to Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe. There barely ever are in Hello! Project PVs. In fact, when you boil down to it, the PV for Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe is just the usual dance shot and close-up with a few other miscellaneous shots to give the PV variety. But it's the presentation that makes Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe work so well. Because this PV has space in it. So much space. I mean, the title of the song translates to Beyond Space and Time so of course there's space in this. But I really love the way UFP handled the visuals of this PV. Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe isn't the first time that Morning Musume has used space in one of their PVs. But in all the other times they've used, the final product has always been kind of... tacky? I feel like that's the wrong word for it; I guess what I'm trying to say is the space themes in those PVs always felt kind of hokey. Not that that's a bad thing, it worked very well in some of the PVs. But in Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe, the concept of space is utilized in a much more serious, sophisticated way. The girls dance against a gorgeous backdrop of stars, the close-ups are dark and moody, and everyone looks absolutely stunning.

And in the end, that's pretty much the only reason why I like the music video for Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe: it's pretty. No, Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe is beautiful. And when it comes down to everything, sometimes that's the only thing I really need to appreciate a music video. The pitfall of so many Momusu videos is that they look cheap or tacky. Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe obviously didn't get a huge budget for its music video, but the way in which the music video is presented just gives it an elegance lacking in a lot of H!P music videos. And besides, I don't always need to see some profound, eloquent storyline in an idol PV. I mean, it's idols, not Stanley Kubrick. I think the dance, the visuals effects, and the styling for Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe come together to make one of the best Morning Musume PVs that I've had the pleasure of reviewing. I don't have much else to say about this music video, because what else can I say? It's a music video about space and it handles that concept extremely well (especially considering this is UPF we're talking about). Obviously, not everyone's going to think this music video is as beautiful as I'm building it up to be, but personally, I loved watching it. I think it was mesmerizing, and the images of stars and the sky were beautifully ethereal.

I should probably take this moment to mention that the PV I screencapped technically isn't the actual music video. It's the "Promotion Edit" aka the Edit So You Have to Buy the DVD. There aren't a ton of differences between the Promotion Edit and the actual music video, but just enough I think I should point out. There are added shots that show the girls lying down in the beginning that aren't present at all in the Promotion Edit. There are also a few different close-ups and edits, along with an entirely new series of close-ups at the end (that also look gorgeous I might add). Which one is better? Well, if you want more space stuff, then I'd got with the actual music video. It's a little less of the standard close-up/dance shot affair that the Promotion Edit is. If you feel the need to buy the single to see the full music video, that's up to you. But in the end, either PV is great. Both PVs have a bunch of extremely flattering shots of everyone in the group. It's so nice that Momusu's styling team has finally got their shit together and figured out what works best on each girl. Overall, the music video(s) for Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe is a visual spectacle showing just how awesome space can be.


I'm in a good mood, and Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe is a good song that gets a good PV. So I think that calls for five apples! What? I love the song, and I love the music video. If more idol music videos could be about space, then my reviews would get much more monotonous! Toki wo Koe Sora wo Koe is a return to the Platinum Era sound mixed with the Colorful Era sound, which makes for one of the more memorable A-sides of Morning Musume's recent discography. The music video is your standard H!P-fare, but it has enough style and flair to be just as memorable as the song. Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'm gonna go watch Firefly.

Gosh, all this technopop and idol pop I've been reviewing lately, it's really given me a craving for some good ol' fashioned rock. Or pop rock. Or idol rock. I'm willing to compromise.


Well, I haven't reviewed Scandal in awhile, so it's about time I took a look at what they've been up to lately! Which is apparently releasing a single that I should have reviewed a month ago. Oh well, I had exams to finish and projects to complete. I did want to review Departure, their latest single, because I know I've got a few Scandal fans who read my blog. And I haven't reviewed any of their material since they released Standard back in November. I know that they released Count Zero/Runners High with TM Revolution, and I'd planned on reviewing that. I really did, until school stuff got in the way and I just kind of... forgot about that single. Oh well, my abridged opinion of Runners High is that it's a pretty decent song. There you go, moving on to Departure! So as the first official single after Standard, how does it kick off Scandal's newest era? Let's find out!

Covers/Outfits

There are three different covers for Departure, and they're all collages. One edition has bigger picture of Haruna and Mami in one collage, and Tomomi and Rina in the other. I think they're really nicely done. The pictures are just simple shots of the girls posing and doing various activities, but there's something very soothing about it. I think the covers make them look very grown-up. I mean, compare their earlier single/album covers with the one now. The girls of Scandal are no longer in high school; they're grown adults, and these covers showcase a more adult image that really makes you see how much time has gone by since the days of Doll and Shoujo S. Where was I? Ah, right, the covers. Yeah, they look really pretty, and I'm happy with them. But if there's one thing music has taught me, it's that you never judge a song by its cover art. So let's depart from talking about the covers for Departure.

Departure

I cannot remember this song. Or at least I couldn't remember it when I started writing this review. And I'd listened to this song several times so I could write about it. I've had to play Departure about 10-20 times to finally remember how it sounded. And yeah, that alone should explain that Departure is not an interesting song. I mean, it kind of nice-sounding, but there are lots of nice-sounding songs that don't sound this lifeless and dull. Actually... okay, this is gonna sound crazy, but do you know what Departure reminds me most of? A Passpo song. A boring Passpo song like Growing Up or Truly. I'm serious, you could have switched the vocals of Scandal with the ones of Passpo, and it wouldn't sound out of place at all. I know I'm sounding harsh, but there's just not a distinctive sound to Departure. Which isn't always a bad thing, but I've heard this song in several other Scandal songs, Passpo songs, and pop rock songs in general. Departure is like... bran flakes. Bran flakes won't hurt you or kill you, but they do absolutely nothing for you other than prevent you from starving. Reviewing this song is like asking me to review bran flakes. I don't have anything that bad to say about Departure, but there's nothing of substance for me to review. I don't mean to sound so harsh, because I want to like this song. I do! But what is there to like that I can't find in better Scandal songs?

There is a PV for Departure, but like several of their other PVs, it's just a nicely edited live performance with the audio playing over it. There isn't much to say about it. The one thing that did throw me off when watching the PV for the first time was seeing the violinists playing in the background. I mean, did anyone else hear violins in the song? I don't have an ear trained to picking out certain sounds, but I didn't hear any violins. Maybe they were told to play pianissimo? But the violinists did make me think that maybe what could have helped Departure would have been a more orchestral sound. In its current state, Departure is a generic, vaguely nice-sounding pop-rock song. However, with some strings? Or even a piano? I just think some kind of orchestral instrumentation could have really improved the song and given it a more distinct sound. But they didn't, and Departure leaves little to no impression with me. I don't want to sound so harsh, but Scandal can do better. Now that I think about it more though, I really would like to hear Scandal tackle a more orchestra-based song. I know it would be against their whole "band" image, but it wouldn't kill them to try it for one song, would it?



I gotta give Departure two-and-half apples. It's an average Scandal song and a really average song in general. I guess if you're a die-hard Scandal fan, you'll like this song? Personally, I've heard better from Scandal, and honestly, I'm already starting to forget how Departure sounded...

Rainy

So fun fact, Rainy was used in the Japanese soundtrack for The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones or as it was titled n Japan, Shadow Hunter. It's okay if you have no idea what movie I'm talking about, it was a very forgettable movie adapted from an equally forgettable book. Luckily, Rainy is not as forgettable as Departure. It definitely has a stronger opening, with a pretty sick guitar riff. It reminds me a bit of Shunkan Sentimental although not as loud. I think that Rainy could have benefitted from being a bit louder though. I mean, when I play Shunkan Sentimental, it just bursts in with such an explosive instrumental. Rainy tries to do the same thing, but then the song tones down after that opening and the vocals kick in. And then it just stays at that same level of energy into the chorus. Which isn't bad, this song isn't terrible at all. Again, it has a more memorable sound than Departure. And I think it works pretty well as a movie theme. It's a shame though that it's the theme used for such a quickly-forgotten movie. Seriously, the only thing I took away from City of Bones was that Johann Sebastian Bach was a shadowhunter. I'm not kidding, master Baroque composer Bach was a shadowhunter, pass it on.

Similar with Departure, I want to like Rainy. Mainly because it is a better song than Departure, and I do like that it has a harder sound. I think Scandal has some great pop-rock songs, but I like when they venture more toward straight up rock like in Queens are trumps, Scandal Nanaka Buttobase, Roppongi Shinjuu, and Shunkan Sentimental. And Rainy does serve as a contrast to the smoother, more laid back sound of Departure. But I feel like again, Rainy could have been a more hardcore song. Maybe with louder guitars, harsher vocals, a shot of energy. Seriously, Rainy sounds so simultaneously energetic and unenergetic, I'm not sure which one it sounds more like. It's like Haruna sounds so... distant when singing the song. I don't know how to explain it. Rainy ends up sounding mostly like a watered-down Shunkan Sentimental. It's softer, less abrasive, and ultimately doesn't leave as much of an impact. But I don't think it's absolutely forgettable! The chorus holds up pretty well, and again, the opening instrumental does leave a pretty great impression when you first hear it. But as the song goes on though, Rainy kind of loses momentum and goes from being a potentially great song to a frustratingly decent song. I think I'll just stick with Shunkan Sentimental.



I'll give Rainy 3.5 apples. A notch above being simply okay, but not quite enough to be considered a 4-apple song. At least not in to my ears. If I had to pick between Departure and Rainy though, I definitely think Rainy would have worked better as the A-side. Maybe they could have had a music video showing the members of Scandal fighting demons!

The Verdict

You know, there are many days when I really don't know what my stance on Scandal is. The inner Zone fan in me keeps me coming back to their music, but when singles like Departure come along, I do kind of feel my interest waning in them. But then they come along with a good B-side or even a great album song. Still, the last A-side that I really really loved from Scandal was Love Survive, and that was way back in 2011. Their singles after that have ranged from decent to forgettable, but nothing has really grabbed me. And Departure certainly isn't breaking that trend. I kind of thought that Departure might grow on me if I gave it some time, but no, it's still... average. A dull and average pop-rock song whose only distinction is that it sounds like a dull and average Passpo song. I want to like this song, because there are J-pop songs out there that are so much worse than Departure. Hello Kitty is much worse than Departure. I know that's technically not a J-pop song, I just thought I'd remind everyone that Hello Kitty is a terrible song. But anyways, while Departure isn't terrible, it's just so very forgettable. Again, if you're a huge Scandal fan, then maybe you'll like this more than I do. Maybe there's some hidden innovation in the instrumental of the song, I don't know.

Rainy fares a bit better than Departure, but the B-side doesn't make me climb to the roof of my house and proclaim that it "saves" the single or anything like that. I mean, it's a decent song to listen to and definitely sticks in your head more than Departure. And again, Rainy and Departure do thankfully sound different from each other. I'd rather listen to two okay-ish songs that sound different than two okay-ish songs that sound exactly the same. I think my biggest problem with Departure is that despite the title, there is nothing new here. Scandal is treading old ground with both the songs on this single. Departure is them defaulting to a calmer sound that sacrifices any originality, and Rainy is the poor man's Shunkan Sentimental. Both songs aren't terrible, but together on one single, they don't offer much to the table. If I were going to introduces someone to Scandal, it wouldn't be with either one of these songs. Neither song on Departure showcases Scandal at their best, and that's a darn shame but so be it. But I know that Scandal can do better. Hell, they have done better. Oh well, Scandal's releasing another single in July. Maybe that'll be more promising than Departure.


I guess I'll give Departure 3 apples. I mean, I'm gonna have to tackle AKB48's Labrador Retriever at some point during this month, so in comparison, Departure is better than that. A lot of songs are, but that's a discussion for another review. Departure is a listenable single, but that's not pretty much it. Unless you're a huge fan of Scandal, then everything on this single is just nice on the ears and that's it. As a casual fan, I'll hold out for something better than Departure though.

What the hell am I doing reviewing something else by Kyarypamyupamyu? I swear to god she released a single like two months ago. I'm gonna end up waiting half a year (again I might add) for Perfume's next single, and Kyary releases one two months after Yume no Hajima Ring Ring!? And now she's releasing an album in July!? Do Kyary and Nakata just not sleep!?


I shouldn't blame Nakata for the onslaught of Kyarypamyupamyu releases this year. It's probably her management that contracts him for Kyary songs at such a rapidfire pace. So Perfume management: get your shit together and give us some more information about Perfume's next single. And Kyary management: lay off the Kyary singles and albums and everything. Please. Just let Kyary tour after releasing Kira Kira Killer and Pikapika Fantajin so I can rest and review something else. I'm not sure why exactly I keep reviewing Kyarypamyupamyu. I have this love-it-or-hate-it relationship with her music. I think it's her endearing personality that keeps me from abandoning reviewing her music altogether. I think people read my reviews of her stuff too? I don't know, I just feel like Kyarypamyupamyu's music is the music I listen to when Perfume hasn't released anything. And luckily for Kyary, Perfume hasn't released a single since November, not that I'm irritated at Perfume's management for being unnecessarily vague about the single. No. Not at all. All right, let's talk about Family Party before Kyary announces another single. I admit, I'm astounded that I've been able to keep up with her releases this well so far...

Covers/Outfits

There are three covers for Family Party, one being a cartoony Crayon Shin-chan type of cover and the other two showing live-action!Kyary doing something weird. So basically the same covers for Kimi ni 100 Percent/Furisodation except with a different concept. And the concept of Family Party's covers must be robots! The regular edition shows Kyary as a giant robot with a strange wig, and the Limited B edition cover (featured above) has her wearing an even stranger wig with some kind of Muppet poking out of it. Even the Limited A cover with cartoon!Kyary shows her as a robot! The regular version is by-far the strangest, and it looks like Kyary is attacking some kind of city with her four giant arms. They're all pretty weird covers, but weird in the bright, friendly way that doesn't freak you out. It's just Kyary wearing and/or doing something quirky like usual. Which isn't always bad, I think these covers look fine! As for the songs on Family Party...

Family Party

...sigh.

Welp, so much for evolution. You know, Kyarypamyupamyu is really not in the position to talk about her musical aims when she doesn't even produce her own music. Especially when half her A-sides are written to be tie-ins for various products and other media. Family Party is her second song related to children's show Crayon Shin-chan, the first being Kimi ni 100 Percent. Now Kimi ni 100 Percent was very much a kid-friendly song, with a beyond-adorable melody and the same lightness that Mirai no Museum had. Unlike Mirai no Museum, Kimi ni 100 Percent's light, fluffy sound fitted Kyary's image, and I surprisingly enjoyed the song. Family Party was created for the movie Crayon Shin-chan: Serious Battle! Robot Dad Strikes back. I've not seen this movie, but I can pretty safely say that it probably involves a robotic father. Just a wild guess. Anyways, Family Party is a movie and that is all it tries to be. The song seems to be about holding a family together, or something that probably relates to the movie. Musically, the song sounds like the kind of song you'd hear on a children's TV show. Look, I don't really expect much from Kyarypamyupamyu's A-sides, but I still find Family Party to be underwhelming.

Yeah, as you may have figured out, I do not like Family Party. Admittedly though, my opinion of it has softened since I first heard it. I mean, the first time I listened to the preview of Family Party, I hated it. I thought Family Party was a terrible song that was equal parts annoying and grating. And... okay, it still kind of is, but not anywhere near as much when I first heard it. There are some cool parts to it, like the 8-bit opening, and I actually kind of like the instrumental. It sounds like something you'd hear in a Nintendo game. My biggest problem with Family Party is that I find it to be annoying, in the same way that a really shitty kids' show is annoying. Family Party is a very juvenile-sounding song, even for Kyarypamyupamyu. And the other thing that turns me off from the song is Kyary's vocals. Her vocals are very hit-or-miss, and something about the way Nakata edited them this time around makes them sound so much more obnoxious and squeaky than some of her other songs. While there are much worse songs out right now Hello Kitty, Family Party is still my least favorite A-side that Kyarypamyupamyu has released. This or Mottai Night Land. Actually, probably Family Party since Mottai Night Land is slightly less annoying in comparison.

While I'm usually split on Kyary's songs, I do enjoy her creative and kooky music videos. The PV for Family Party garners a slightly different opinion from me than the song. However, I still must admit that it isn't my favorite Kyary music video. I didn't know what was going on it any more than I did some of her previous music videos, but still. I admit, Family Party didn't look very much like a "family party" at least not the ones I've been too (mine have much more cornbread and barbecue chicken). It looked more like a Wii game. Everything was very white and retro-futuristic looking, and I don't think the letters in the PV were actually letters. Unless they just took German letters and flipped them around a bit. Basically, Family Party's concept is that Kyary is playing some kind of game with this robot that's also being operated from inside by Kyary and there's this referee that holds up random cards, and I don't know, it doesn't make a lot of sense. Coming after the very sensical Yume no Hajima Ring Ring, the PV for Family Party is kind of refreshing in how random it is. But you've still got your staple Kyary elements: the quirky mascot, the quirky backup dancers, the quirky person wearing a mask, buckets and buckets of quirkiness.

But it's the presentation of Family Party that makes it a good PV. Because while I've seen all these elements in every Kyary PV ever, the way they're handled is very nice and entertaining. This is a very fast PV, and there are a lot of different images that you can catch. For instance, Kyary and the robot's teams are presented by a dog and a parrot. Why? Who knows! I guess families have pet dogs and parrots. I think I heard someone say that this PV was supposed to represent how hard managing a family is, but personally, I don't see it. I guess you could kind of connect that concept to Kyary managing the robot with her multiple arms. At the end of the day though, I don't think Family Party's PV needs a hidden meaning to make it watchable. It isn't good for the brain to dwell long on analyzing a Kyarypamyupamyu PV anyways. It's just a fun, quirky PV that you'd expect by now from Kyarypamyupamyu. Overall, I was entertained, and really, that's a PV has to do sometimes. Watching the PV did make the song a little bit more tolerable as well. Not enough for me to like the song, but just enough that I can tolerate it.



I'm only giving Family Party two apples, and nothing will convince me otherwise. Not even the extended mix that this song will probably get, because Nakata loves making extended mixes out of Kyary's A-sides. Maybe if I was a fan of Kyary's "kawaii" technopop style of music, I'd be a bigger fan of Family Party. But as of now, Family Party is a party that I have no intentions of attending any time soon.

Scanty Skimpy

With a title like Scanty Skimpy, I was expecting something either really weird or really cute. It turned out to be the latter. Scanty Skimpy is a very cute little song that's just a tad bit whimsical. It also sounds kind of... French? I'm not an avid listener of French pop, but Scanty Skimpy sounds like something I'd hear out of Amélie. What I like about Scanty Skimpy is that it's one of Kyary's cute songs that isn't cute in an extremely annoying/sugary way like Mottai Night Land or Point of view or half the tracks off Nanda Collection. It's just this cute little song that's kinda simple-sounding but sweet. The song Scanty Skimpy reminds me most of is Furisodation, except not quite as energetic. It's still a pretty peppy song, and it fits with Kyary's music style. Although it might fit with her music style a little too smoothly. Scanty Skimpy comes off as a tad bit underwhelming. I mean, it's nowhere near as underwhelming as Family Party. In fact, I'd rather Scanty Skimpy have been the A-side over Family Party. This song isn't as annoying! But it's a very basic Kyary song, that doesn't bring too much to the table. The melody is very nice, and that French pop-vibe does add a lot of charm to the song.

I was actually curious about the lyrics for Scanty Skimpy, since the title sounds kind of tantalizing/flirtatious. Turns out Scanty Skimpy is about a girl who likes to eat but also wants to wear cute clothes and is torn between the two. So kind of like Berryz Koubou's diet song only not as weird. Wow, I can't believe I just said a Berryz Koubou song was weirder than a Kyarypamyupamyu song. Anyways, the only other thing noteworthy about Scanty Skimpy is Kyary's vocals (kind of). They sound just as squeaky as Nakata always edits them, but Kyary commented (I think on her Twitter) how it was hard to sing Scanty Skimpy because she had to use her "lower voice." When the song first started, I had no idea what she was talking about. But getting to the verses, I did notice her voice was surprisingly low. So many of her songs are so high-pitched, and it was kind of refreshing. Then of course it went back to the squeaky high voice. Admittedly, those "low" notes aren't that low; I'm a soprano, and I could have belted them out. Just in comparison to the rest of the song, those verses are a tad bit lower. Other than that, this was a decent B-side, although I liked Slow-mo better.



I think it's appropriate to give Scanty Skimpy four apples. It's a good song, and blissfully, it doesn't get on my nerves the way Family party does. Scanty Skimpy is a cute little song, and that's pretty much what you can expect. It doesn't try anything too crazy, other than a few melodies, but it was pleasant on my ears. So yeah. On to the final track...

Invader Invader -extended mix-

What is this, extended mix #20 now? It's pretty much expected that a Kyary single is going to have an extended mix of one of her A-sides, and this time that extended mix falls onto Invader Invader. Funny, that was the last Kyary single I reviewed... Previously on Nia's Wonderland, I found Invader Invader to be an enjoyable song but lacking in anything distinctive beyond a gratuitous Dubstep break. So does Invader Invader -extended mix- add more substance to the song? Well, certainly not in the lyrics. There are a few extra vocals added to this mix, but it's mostly just Kyary repeating the title and a few more "Wows" and "Yeahs." It starts pretty much the same as the original, only there's a brief instrumental before Kyary starts the chorus instead of immediately jumping into it. After Kyary starts singing, the rest of Invader Invader -extended mix- is relatively similar to the original. I'm sure there are a few slight changes in instrumentation that I didn't catch. Invader Invader -extended mix- really starts sounding like an extended mix until after the second chorus, when that instrumental is drawn out. Other than that, Invader Invader -extended mix- is one of Nakata's remixes that's stayed relatively similar to the original.

Compared to the original, I like Invader Invader -extended mix- about the same. The extended instrumental bits are my favorite parts, since they add even more kookiness to the song. But the mix doesn't blow the original out of the water (or into space is what I should say). I'd be content with listening to either one. I will say though that Invader Invader -extended mix- doesn't diminish anything from the original recording, which is what several of these other extended mixes have suffered from. Of course, Nakata still keeps that Dubstep break in, and somehow it still sounds just as random and unnecessary as it did in the original Invader Invader. The biggest weakness of Invader Invader -extended mix- is that it doesn't add anything terribly different to the original. It's too... safe of a mix? I guess I could also say that's the biggest strength of Invader Invader -extended mix- because it doesn't compromise the original in a bad way. But a best-case scenario extended mix would have been a mix that both changed and enhanced the original. Invader Invader -extended mix- does a little bit of that, but only to a small degree. Still, it's a decent listen!



I'm kinda torn on what to give Invader Invader -extended mix-, but I ended up giving it four apples, like I did with the original! It's pretty good as far as extended mixes go, but there isn't a lot of note that's added to with it. If someone into electronic production wants to pick into this mix, then feel free! They might find more to talk about with this extended mix than I did...

The Verdict

It's not even June yet, and already I feel kind of burnt out on Kyarypamyupamyu. Yume no Hajima Ring Ring, Family Party, Kira Kira Killer, and now a whole new album, and all this is just by July. Maybe it would help if Family Party was a stronger single, like Yume no Hajima Ring Ring. But the A-side for Family Party is just a kid-friendly song for Crayon Shin-chan that I find to be too cutesy and annoying to enjoy. Scanty Skimpy is better, but it's still a B-side and not even the best Kyary song I've ever heard. And I didn't really need an extended mix of Invader Invader. Luckily, Invader Invader -extended mix- is actually pretty fun, but even then, it didn't change that much in the original. So I've got one bad song and two decent songs. My final verdict? Family Party is worth listening to if you're into Kyarypamyupamyu's music. If you're looking to get into her music, I wouldn't start with this single though. I'd start with Fashion Monster or Ninjari Bang Bang or Candy Candy or even Pamyu Pamyu Revolution. But not Family Party. If you like Kyary's cuter and more saccharine music, then you might find Family Party to offer a better selection of songs than I did. There are definitely some interesting things in all these songs, but for me, it comes down to a matter of taste.

I think the problem with me and Kyarypamyupamyu is that most of her stuff is too cute for me, Family Party included. If I'm in the mood for cute, bubbly technopop songs, then yeah, sometimes her stuff works. But most of the time when I'm listen to her music, it's like being force-fed Pixie sticks and cotton candy. I do like Nakata's compositions though, and I think it's the instrumentals of Family Party that make me enjoy this single more. I listened to the instrumentals of Family Party and Scanty Skimpy, and I actually think I enjoy them more than the actual songs! Especially Family Party's, I really love the 8-bit usage in the instrumental and the melody sounds so much nicer without Kyary singing. That's when it occurred to me... maybe the reason I'm not a huge fan of a lot of Kyary songs is because I don't like her voice that much. I mean, I'll take her over Dempagumi.inc (I'll take anything over Dempagumi.inc though, even vultures getting castrated). Same goes for Scanty Skimpy; it's a really cute instrumental, and again, I could see it being a movie track to an artsy little French movie! So I guess overall... if you like Kyary's voice and her cute style, then you'll like Family Party more than I did. But if you like Nakata's compositions more, listen to the instrumentals. They're still cute, but not quite as overtly cute as when Kyary is singing.



So after those three tracks of varying cuteness, I think I'll give Family Party three and half apples! Eugh, reviewing this single makes me feel like I need to brush my teeth or something. Yeah, I need to feel edgy and hardcore again; I'm gonna go listen to some Capsule.

Okay, this makes up for everything. The months of waiting, the lack of a 3rd World Tour, the vagueness about Hold Your Hand, everything. Because Perfume is back and they're releasing a single.

Gaze upon them and be amazed.

All I can say is it's about damn time. And that I am really excited. I woke up this morning and probably would have screamed had I not just woken up. Do you know what a great feeling it is to wake up and find out that your favorite group has finally announced the release of a new single? Along with a promotional pic and the full CD and DVD tracklists? I am over the moon. I think AKB48 has something about their Senbatsu, but whatever that is, it is at the back of my mind right now, because Perfume. Perfume Perfume Perfume!!! They're finally releasing something new! To think Sweet Refrain was released back in November, and all this year we've gone with only hints of a new single, the most prominent release being the digital release of Hold Your Hand. Well, now Perfume's management has stopped being so tight-lipped about it and given full details on Perfume's 20th single since their major debut! That single is titled Cling Cling and is set to be released July 16th. Which is a little bit later than I'd like it to be, but I think most of June will be getting previews of the songs and music video for this single. And the title sounds pretty cool, kind of catchy too. Maybe this'll be a song similar to Laser Beam!

Above is also the promotional pic for the single, which in my opinion looks awesome. And not just the outfits themselves; the background looks really cool too. It looks very dark and gritty, like something you'd see out of Blade Runner. As of now, the covers for Cling Cling haven't been released yet, let alone the PV, but I do wonder what kind of concept they'll have. Based off this picture, I'd think it's something cool! Or at least I hope it is. I read somewhere in a translation of a Perfume Locks! episode that one of the members of Perfume mentioned that there was going to be a fight scene in their next single's music video. I don't know if that's true, but if it is, I am totally game for a fight scene! I love violence! Or... okay, that did not come out the way I intended it to. I... like the choreography that goes into creating fight scenes. It's like dancing only with more punches and kicks. I'm also excited about the outfits for this single. They look amazing. They kind of remind me of the same style AKB48 used for Flying Get, only with a different color scheme. And the hair and makeup look great too, especially Nocchi's hair! I love that they straightened it; it looks very badass!

Even better, the good news for Cling Cling doesn't stop here. The tracklist has already been unveiled. And it has four different songs. Four! That's the most that Perfume's had on any single, surpassing Linear Motor Girl and Spending all my time! It's probably because Perfume won't have time to release another single until late this year or early next year, but still. I'm excited, I've waited far longer than I would have liked for more Perfume songs. Here's the full tracklist:

1. Cling Cling
2. Hold Your Hand
3. Display
4. Ijiwaru na Hello
5. Cling Cling -Original Instrumental-
6. Hold Your Hand -Original Instrumental-
7. Display -Original Instrumental-
8. Ijiwaru na Hello -Original Instrumental-

Honestly, I'm glad that Hold Your Hand isn't the lead song off this single. Unlike the other songs on this single, Hold Your Hand has been around for awhile now, as it was used in the NHK J-drama Silent Poor. Yesterday, it was released as a digital single in Japan, which made me wonder if it was going to be used as the A-side for Perfume's next single. The fact that Perfume hadn't yet announced that Hold Your Hand would be there next A-side is what kept me skeptical. I thought that maybe it would be one of two on a double A-side single. It's been awhile since Perfume's had one of those! But nope, looks like Hold Your Hand is just going to be a very nicely promoted B-side! Which is good. Because it's an all right song, but I'd rather it be a B-side. Anyways, the other three new tracks I know nothing about beyond the titles. And I'm not going to make the mistake of judging them by their titles this time around, although it is kind of tempting. Especially with that 4th track which translates to "Mean Hello" or "Mean Halo" depending on which translation is correct. Other than that, I'm trying to stay open minded. Here's what's on the normal Limited Edition DVD:

1. Cling Cling -Video Clip-
2. Cling Cling -Teaser-
3. Display (Short Ver.) -Video Clip-
4. “Perfume FES!! 2014” 3/15 - 4/11 Digest

My immediate reaction was, "There are two LE editions!?" Kind of a surprise, and I wonder if there will also be a normal Regular Edition. I've got to think there will be, Perfume always has one! My second reaction was seeing that Display would get a short PV. I wonder why it's just a short PV though and not just the entire version. Why not just shoot a full PV? Maybe it has to do with the song length or something. Or maybe even the full PV will be included on Perfume's next album, whenever that comes.  Still, this is all purely speculation. Maybe UMJ just really wanted a short PV for display. Anyways, the second LE edition is actually a box of sort. And this is what's on that "Large Box Special" Limited Edition DVD:

1. Cling Cling -Video Clip-
2. Cling Cling -Teaser-
3. Display (Short Ver.) -Video Clip-
4. “Perfume FES!! 2014” 3/15 - 4/11 Digest
5. Nishiwaki Family Memorial “Spice” “Shining☆Star”

So the only real difference is the inclusion of the Spice and Shining Star performances at Perfume's joint concert with 9nine. We've seen a few video clips of both performances but not the full version, so I'm definitely interested in that! It was so surreal seeing A-chan perform with 9nine and her little sister perform with Perfume! I wonder if the full versions will be even weirder... I'm not sure which edition I want to buy. I'd like to buy the Large Box Special version, but I've got to think that's one expensive release to try ordering. I may just go with the regular LE edition, since I'm sure I can find a leak of the 9nine/Perfume performances online. But that'll all come in due time, as for now I am excited. Really really excited. The promo pic for Cling Cling looks awesome, the tracklist looks awesome, everything on this single had better be awesome or I'm gonna be sorely disappointed. The only thing that's kind of a bummer is that we have to wait until July... Oh well, I was betting on an August release date, so this is kind of a pleasant surprise! I can now plan my Time Capsule Review poll around this release too, since I was waiting for more information about this single before planning June's poll. Other than my own Wonderland stuff, I'm definitely keeping an eye out for Cling Cling. Oh, this is going to add to my summer... I can't wait!

What do you guys think? Are you excited? Are you desperate for radio rips and other previews from Cling Cling? Or are you waiting patiently and miraculously coping with Perfume withdrawal better than I am? If so, tell me how you stand the wait!

So the preliminary results are out for AKB48's 5th Senbatsu Election. As you have probably seen by now, there are a variety of ups and downs with these first-day results. As there are still a few weeks to go until voting time ends, I'll just briefly go over my own opinions- You know what? I really don't care.

Yeah, do you guys wanna talk about something else? Like Perfume? BiS disbanding? The state of the economy and how it will effect graduating students? Do any of you guys actually care about the Senbatsu election this year? Because I really don't. I don't know what it is about this year. Maybe it's the fact that most of the members I liked have jumped ship graduated by now. Maybe it's because AKB48's music has gotten so unoriginal that there's no point in getting excited now. Or maybe it's because I know that the same people who got it last year are going to get it this year with little to no surprises. And those surprises will probably be dull ones. Sasshi's gonna get center, Mayu and Jurina won't be far behind, and the members that AKS pushed for Senbatsu will get in the Senbatsu. I'm sorry, it's just boring now. I don't feel that same nervous anticipation from elections past. I think it's just because I don't really care about any of the members now. Most of them are from different groups anyways, so the Senbatsu's probably gonna end up with like five of sixteen girls actually being in AKB48. Gosh, I don't see why AKS just doesn't go ahead and shuffle all the members together since they like cherry-picking their favorites from other groups so... much... wait a a minute...

What if... what if AKS could take other members from other idol groups?

I'm not talking about just the sisters groups, I'm talking about any idol group. From Morning Musume to Team Syachihoko to Brand-new Idol Society, it doesn't matter. Any group. Obviously, this can't ever happen due to conflicts between agencies, but abstractly speaking, it's a cool idea. I always love seeing idols interact with each other on music and variety shows, even if it's just for a little bit. And one of my favorite concepts is the shuffle groups from Hello! Project. It's a shame they don't do that anymore. Seeing other H!P idols out of their usual groups is such a cool, kind of surreal thing to watch. Thinking about this got me thinking about what members I would choose if I could make my own Senbatsu. I'd definitely get different idols from vastly different groups into one group. I think to do this I'll stick to the 16-member format that the current AKB48 Senbatsu election has. Everything else though is fair game. I am sticking to idols that are still around, so no idols from the 80s or 90s or early 2000s. Besides, I don't follow enough of those older idols to even make a full Senbatsu of them. So not only would I build my own Senbatsu, but I'd also be in control of who produced the songs on my Senbatsu single.

I think I'd have the leading song be produced by Togawa Jun, former idol herself. Togawa Jun is known for her weird, usually morbid and grotesque music and lyrics, but she has a very theatric style. I always remember what her songs sound like after the first or second listen. I think it would be cool seeing the former ero-guro idol produce a song for an idol group, especially a Senbatsu along the lines of AKB48. It would probably be weird and may even turn people off from it, but it would be so interesting. But I'd also want a song produced by Shiina Ringo, and definitely Hyadain, and maybe even Nakata Yasutaka or Usagi Disco. I think what I'd do is split my Senbatsu into little subunits, and each producer would create a song for each subunit. So Nakata would do an electronic song, Ringo would do alternative, and Hyadain would do... whatever you call his stuff. Those would all be the B-sides of the single, and the Togawa Jun-produced song would serve as the A-side. The overall single would be a collage of different styles of music from pop to techno alternative. Most importantly though, there would be any bland, generic AKB48-style songs on them.

There's also the matter of a music video... I love reviewing music videos, so mine definitely wouldn't be the generic dance shot/close-ups idol music video. I think I'd want a story in mine. Nothing deep or mind screw-y, just a clear storyline. Maybe it would involve saving the world from a government agency set to destroy idol groups. And all these idols in my Senbatsu are survivors from their own groups, so they all band together to release a song so epic that it destroys the powers trying to suppress idols. It wouldn't be a long PV, but I think I'd have it at around 10-15 minutes. It would be mostly action, taking performance with fight scenes and mashing them together. I would either have that as the music video or this: an homage to idols. It would include re-enactments of famous idol music videos and performances, from Matsuda Seiko to Morning Musume. I've always liked it when idols reference other idols, but it never happens that much. This music video would be kind of like Togawa Jun's music video for Suki Suki Daisuki but not satirical.

Then there's the most important aspect of my Senbatsu: the members. Since I have free reign in my own little imaginary world, I'd want as many members from different groups as possible. There would also be this melting pot of different personalities! Like some would have dancing as their strong point or vocals or personality! And a lot of these idols are just personal favorites of mine. So let's take a look at Nia's Senbatsu and see how impossible it would be!

16. Masui Mio (Passpo) - At the bottom of my Senbatsu, I'd go with Mio from Passpo. Her and Negishi Ai are my favorite members of Passpo, but between the two, I'd go with Mio in my own Build-a-Senbatsu. Not that Ai would be a bad choice either, but I think Mio has a stronger personality that would shine better amongst fifteen other girls. In such a big group, it's easy for certain idols to get drown out by more prominent personalities and voices. While Mio may not have the greatest voice, she's got just enough charisma and charm to hold her own in my Senbatsu! And besides, she's such a cutie; how can you not love that mischievous little grin?

15. Kanazawa Tomoko (Juice=Juice) - I like all the members of Juice=Juice, but I think the member that would fit the best with different idols is Tomoko. She has this poise and confidence in her singing and dancing that some of the younger members of Juice=Juice lack. And since most of the members of my Senbatsu would be older, Tomoko would fit nicely among them. But she isn't only a fitting member visually; Tomoko also has the pipes to back that up! Sure, her voice isn't the strongest, but it's still a nice balance between low and high. Which is good considering the two members behind and ahead of her in this Senbatsu...

14. Momota Kanako (Momoiro Clover Z) - Of course, a good Senbatsu isn't a good Senbatsu without some different flavors in it! And Kanako of the zany and crazy (or at least they used to be) Momoiro Clover Z could bring some real zest to the Senbatsu! I wouldn't want her to be leading vocals of this Senbatsu though, so she'd be at a lower position. That way she still has presence, and I don't have to hear her shriek! Maybe at their live performances, Kanako could performance her signature "shrimp jump" at the end of one of the songs! She may come off as a bit creepy in some of the group singles, but Kanako would still provide a lot of entertainment!

13. Nishiwaki Sayaka (9nine) - As A-chan's little sister has already proved with 9nine's joint concert with Perfume, she's capable of fitting in with another group nearly seamlessly. I thought about putting A-chan herself in this Senbatsu, but I think she fits better with Perfume. Sayaka on the other hand has got just as good of a voice as A-chan and just as great of a smile! And she's more seasoned to being an idol rather than a performer! Sayaka could do the MCs at my Senbatu's concerts and provide the waterworks! I wonder if emotional, passionate crying is a genetic trait in the Nishiwaki family...

12. Tentenko (BiS) - There's nothing like an idol who isn't afraid to do weird things for the sake of entertainment, and every member of BiS could basically qualify for that. But to me, the member of BiS that seems the most okay with doing anything weird is Tentenko. Seeing some of her antics on music shows, I firmly believe that Tentenko is up for anything, even a Senbatsu with fifteen other girls. Tentenko could be the more risque, unconventional representative of this Senbatsu, doing strange, sometimes grotesque things on and off stage. But still being freaking adorable. And with BiS disbanding, that would give Tentenko an outlet to something else idol-related!

11. Yamamoto Sayaka (NMB48) - The only thing that tops a cute idol is a cool idol, and Yamamoto Sayaka is just about as radical as mainstream idols get. She plays the guitar, she's the badass and understanding leader of NMB48, and she has a nice voice to boot! Should my Senbatsu ever do a single in which they decided to play as a band, my management would be sane and allow Sayanee to play the guitar. Should my #1 Senbatsu member not be around for a performance, Sayanee could easily take up her heels and lead the rest of the Senbatsu to a great performance. Other than that, Sayanee's just cool. Can she be in all the idol groups?

10. Ishida Ayumi (Morning Musume) - Why did I pick Ayumi out of all the Morning Musume members? Well, because she's one of the groups best dancers and doesn't shriek the same way Riho does. Speaking of which, in my Senbatsu, all the girls will hit notes that are comfortable to their ranges, Ayumi included. Speaking of which, there's a position in K-pop groups called the "lead dancer" that I wish J-pop groups would utilize more. Because Ayumi, along with one other girl on this Senbatsu would definitely take up that position, with kickass dance solos in my Senbatsu's songs and special dance numbers in concert performances!

9/8. Rena & Risa (Vanilla Beans) - I don't follow Vanilla Beans very closely, but from the songs I've listened to and PVs I've watched, the two members of the duo come off as very classy. Like refined, stylish robots from a retro-style future. I don't know much about the members' personalities, so I've no idea how either one of them would mesh personality-wise with the rest of my Senbatsu. But visually, I think they would contribute both finesse and style to my Senbatsu, giving a veneer of effortless class. Kind of like GAM did except with more style and slightly less sexual tension. Like GAM though, the legs of the Vanilla Beans girls go on for miles.

7. Nakajima Saki (C-ute) - Here we are now in the Kami 7 of my Senbatsu, those holy seven idols who make up the top tier. Filling that first Kami 7 spot along with the other position of leader dance in my Senbatsu would be the lovely Nakky. Not only is Nakky one of my favorite H!P members, but she's also one of the best dancers. Nakky can pull off both adorable and sensual dance, sometimes at the same time. Not only that she can look cute and sweet or sexy and badass. She's kind of like a chameleon! In my Senbatsu, she and Ayumi would have dance solos, and maybe even a dance battle like the ones Ayumi partakes with Riho in Momusu!

6. Nakamoto Suzuka (Babymetal) - While I'm not a fan of Babymetal, I do love the voice of the main singer, Suzuka or Su-Metal as she goes by in Babymetal. Her voice has such great power and resonance, along with a very distinct sound. I love strong voices, so I would definitely have her in my Senbatsu. That's why I have her in one of the higher positions, so she could sing more prominently than in any of those lower positions. And her experience in a metal idol group should give her a different perspective than the other Senbatsu members. But she still also has experience in traditional idol group Sakura Gakuin. It's the best of both worlds!

5. Minegishi Minami (AKB48) - I guess I'm kind of cheating by including a member of AKB48 on a Senbatsu that's kind of not supposed to be solely AKB48 members... But Miichan is just awesome! She's adorable and kooky and sweet, and she went through so much crap last year. And from the looks of it, she's probably not gonna make it onto this year's election Senbatsu either. And if she does, it won't be a high position. So on my Senbatsu, Miichan would have a high position in the Kami 7! The only reason she's not higher is because I have a few more idols that I like just a teensy bit better. But still, I'd definitely want Miichan up high for her bubbling personality!

4. Terashima Yufu - I've always missed Yufu ever since she left BiS, but it does make me happy that she's started solo activities again. I think Yufu's got one of the most distinct idol voices on the market right now, and it really makes her stand out. So I'd want her to be at the top of the Senbatsu, where the more solos/duets/trios would be. Also like Tentenko, she has a past with BiS, along with being an idol on her own. So she's been both a member and a soloist, with two very different images for each! And Yufu's such a photogenic member. Even in BiS she always looked very pretty, whether she was swinging a baseball bat or covered in fake blood!

3. Konishi Ayano (Tokyo Girls' Style) - Even though her voice has been struggling these past two years, I'd still like Ayano in my Senbatsu. She has such a distinctive voice, and her performance skills are pretty high too! I'd want Ayano in my top 3 because again, she has a strong voice and I think she'd carry herself well in the top 3 of my Senbatsu. She also comes from the mature Tokyo Girls' Style, so I think she'd be up for doing a more mature concept despite her young age. I mean, have you guys seen the PV for Juujika? She totally rocks it! And so does Hitomi, but when it comes down to those two, I'd still have to go with Ayano. She's got the pipes for my Senbatsu!

2. Curumi Chronicle - Much like Suzuka, Curumi Chronicle offers a different angle of idol music than many of the other idols on this list. As the only purely technopop idol, Curumi might enjoy performing more traditional music. And I think it would help her to participate in a group! She seems a little nervous and hesitant when it comes to performing. So singing with a big group of girls might help Curumi come out of her shell and allow her to grow more comfortable with performing alone. I thought about making her #1, but I figured she wouldn't be up to centering a single. Besides, I had one person as #1 from the very beginning I thought of this idea...

1. Akimoto Sayaka - I don't care if Sayaka's graduated from being an idol, I'd still want her to be the center of my Senbatsu! Sure, she's 25, but so what? If Shinoda Mariko stayed an idol until she was 27, I'm sure Sayaka could too! Something that always pained me was that Sayaka never got a really high spot during the Senbatsu elections, only making it so far as #12. Personally, I think she deserved better, even after that scandal that wasn't really a scandal. Sayaka has a great voice, vibrant personality, commanding stage presence, she was probably so cool that AKS got blinded by her coolness and were afraid to promote her!

There you have it! Now this would just be my Senbatsu. As for what B-sides would go on each single and who would produce them, I think I've figured that out:

• Shiina Ringo: Akimoto Sayaka, Konishi Ayano, Terashima Yufu, Nakamoto Suzuka, Yamamoto Sayaka, Tentenko

Ringo could definitely do something weird and experimental, and these six idols have the vocals to pull off some weird stuff. I don't know if Ringo would go the more jazz or rock route, but either one would work! I'm thinking maybe a little bit more jazz though, something mature and sensual like Meisai. And she could add some percussion in too! This would be kind of bombastic and scattered song, with smooth, sexy vocals to carry it through.

• Nakata: Curumi Chronicle, Rena & Risa, and Nishiwaki Sayaka

For the electronic number, I think I'd want something more on the pop side for Nakata's work. Not like straight-up idol pop, but maybe something that combines a futuristic sound with the peppy sound of J-pop. I'm thinking along the lines of Aira Mitsuki's works or even Perfume's Computer City or Electro World. And if there was a music video, it could be similar to Spring of Life! That would be so cool... I just love technopop that sounds like it comes from The Jetsons-style future...

• Hyadain: Minegishi Minami, Momota Kanako, Kanazawa Tomoko, Masui Mio

The crazy ones, all in one group together. Okay, Tomoko's not that crazy, but it would do her good to be around Kanako and Miichan! The Hyadain single would be totally all over the place, with a variety of random sounds kind like what he did in Wani to Shampoo. This would definitely be a pop song, maybe with elements of ska or punk in it. I'm thinking something very fast-paced, that doesn't require strong vocals but is still really catchy!

• Nakata (again): Nakajima Saki and Ishida Ayumi

What? I really like Nakata's work... In contrast to the other group, this duo of Nakky and Ayumi would have a dance song. Something like Party Maker or The music or maybe even Jumper, with minimal vocals and an emphasis on the dance aspect. In fact, wouldn't be cool if Mikiko could choreograph it? I would love to see Mikiko choreograph a duo, I think she could really work off that dynamic! It would be a long song too, five minutes at least, mostly instrumental.

Admittedly, my ideal Senbatsu and single would be a mess. But it would be a wonderful mess. I noticed from doing this that I either like cool idols with strong voices or idols with outgoing personalities. And that I like music that isn't boring, but I already knew that. My ideal Senbatsu will never happen. It isn't feasible in any way possible, but it's still really fun to imagine this kind of Senbatsu in lieu of the usual one that we're gonna get at AKB48's Senbatsu election this year. So I want to extend this question to you guys: who would you have in your Senbatsu. You can pick anyone, retired or not retired, old or young, as long as they have been an idol at some point. You also get total creative control over what they release. They can be a concert-based idol group, more commercial, street-performers, etc. They can release any genre of music bland or unconventional, same for music videos. You are in control, which is something that none of us will probably ever get to be when it comes to idol groups. I'm sure some of you guys have fantasized what it would be like creating your own idol group. And if you haven't, you should try it! It's really fun! And it may even reflect your own personal taste in idols and even music!

I don't like to go into extensive detail about my personal life, but I just wanted to let all you lovely readers know that I am now a high school graduate!

And I have the hat and diploma to prove it!

I bring this up on the Wonderland, because it's a big deal. Not just for me personally, but for my future in the world and for blogging as well. I've said several times that I don't know how college will affect my blogging frequency. I do know that around midterms and final exams, I'm gonna be swamped. But outside of academics, I wonder what else I'll be doing, especially my first semester. Will I do more social stuff? More reading? It'll be so strange living on my own away from my family for the first time. I think I'm capable of doing it, but I now there are going to be challenges that I'll have to face alone. And that kind of intimidates me, along with all the differences of being a high school student and a college student. I've known several blogs that have pretty much shut down after their writers went off to college. Will that happen to the Wonderland? I hope not! I love writing on this blog and I love that you guys like my writing! It's wonderful reading feedback and different opinions about a genre of music that isn't popular at all where I live. All I can say is that I promise I will do my best to keep blogging as a college student, but I warn you that there will probably be times where I have to lay off. Just know that I don't mean to, and that life will get in the way.

Other than that, I am so happy to be done with high school. I've been in school for twelve years, and to be done with all that work and stress is very... weird. Honestly, I feel kind of empty. Not the bad kind of empty, but like I've just shed an old, worn skin for a new one. This summer is going to be that weird limbo between high school and college for me. Of course, obviously life isn't going to magically get easier after graduation. I know that things are going to be hard for me in college and beyond, and I'll probably encounter some of the same hardships that I faced in high school. In fact, I'm expecting it. Nothing will be easy, but it's still nice to be done with something that took so long to complete. I mean, I've been in school for over half my life. Sure, sometimes, it's driven me crazy, but it has been a constant. It's been a place to bond with friends to cope through all the nonsensical moments, and I've learned a lot of things! Some of that stuff I probably won't ever need to know in the future, but it was still nice having the privilege to learn that. Like these past two years, I've gotten to take actual college classes alongside my required high school classes. Today, I've graduated from high school, but I'm entering college with roughly 40 hours of college credits under my belt. Which is amazing, because I'll have less required classes to take.

Anyways, that's all I really wanna say about graduating. College is still a few months away, so I want to spend this summer doing the things I love, blogging included! Right now I'm exhausted and relieved and happy and a lot of other emotions that I haven't quite untwisted yet. I think now I'm just gonna go listen to some idol graduation songs like Sakura Nakamichi by Whiteberry, 10nen Zakura by AKB48, Sotsugyou by Zone, all those happy idol graduation songs. And maybe even a few more serious ones like Sakura Goodbye by Scandal and Sakura no Ki ni Narou by AKB48. I will ask though if you guys have any sakura/graduation idol songs that you like!

What does do churches, roses, and neon crosses all have in common? Read on, if you dare, to find out...


It was a bright and sunny day when I sat at my bedroom window, plotting and pondering. What dark thoughts invaded my mind on such a day? Well... I was wondering how Gakkou no Kaidan -Noroi no Kotodama- will turn out. What is this? Well, it's a horror movie starring the girls of Tokyo Girls' Style. The title translates to "Ghost Stories -The Power of Cursed Words-" so the only thing I really know about this movie is that it's a horror film that involves the spirit world. According to Twitch Film, this movie is actually part of a movie series popular in the nineties, popular enough to get four movies. Perhaps this movie is supposed to revive that series! Anyways, the summary states that Gakkou no Kaidan -Noroi no Kotodama- is about ghosts and the spirit world and abandoned schools, you know, common elements of a good horror story. I've got to think that this movie is probably going to be your typical B-movie horror film though. That's what most idol films are. The only thing I'm really interested in with this movie is how well the girls of TGS act. I mean, have they ever starred in their own full-length movie before? I've got to think the acting's either going to be decent or campy. Either way, I won't be swimming to Japan to see this movie.

But I will listen to the theme song. Not only are the girls of TGS involved in this movie, but they're also providing the theme song for it. That song is aptly titled Juujika ~Eiga "Gakkou no Kaidan -Noroi no Kotodama-" Ver. For convenience's sake, I'm just going to call it Juujika, which translates to "cross" in English. Now I haven't listened to many horror movie idol themes, but the two horror movie idol themes that come to my mind are Buono!'s Deep Mind and Berrikyuu's Amazuppai Haru ni Sakura Saku. Now Deep Mind works pretty well as a horror movie song; the tone is serious and the heavy guitars definitely give it a more edgier sound. But admittedly, it's not a very creepy song that gives you shivers up your spine. As for Amazuppai Haru ni Sakura Saku... do I even have to talk about that bore of a song? Even as a song alone, Amazuppai Haru ni Sakura Saku is an awful song, especially if you wanna use it for a horror film. I think a horror theme works better when it's actually creepy and deviates less from being a traditional idol song. Like Bellring Shoujo Heart, now that's a group that could pull off a creepy horror movie song. TGS is one of the more mature idol groups out there though, so I could see them pulling off a spooky horror movie theme.

So where does Juujika stand on my Creep-O-Meter, a device that is absolutely real and I totally did not make up a few seconds ago. Well, I'd give a Juujika a... 7.6 out of 10. The beginning of the song starts out very ominously, with the always stellar choice of a music box. That eerie little melody then leads into the actual song, where things get less creepy but still maintain a sinister atmosphere. It's better than Amazuppai Haru ni Sakura Saku! Juujika sounds like the exact kind of thing Tokyo Girls' Style would do for a horror movie. It still sounds a little creepy, but also very polished like much of their other music. Juujika reminds me a bit of Bad Flower, the difference being that Bad Flower is a much more rock-oriented song. Vocally, the two sound very much like, especially in the chorus. But you get that with a lot of TGS songs, so that's nothing new. Did I get scared listening to Juujika? Did shivers run up my spine and did I feel the inevitable urge to hold a seance and run into the woods chasing ghosts? Eh... no. I think Juujika could have been... messier? It sounds like a very controlled song, and adding just a bit of pandemonium to the arrangement might have upped the scare factor. Like Bellring Shoujo Heart's (again) Circus & Renai Soudan. That's one hell of a creepy song, and part of that stems from how chaotic and off the arrangement is.

Still, I like Juujika! I mean, if you like Tokyo Girls' Style then you're going to like Juujika. It still has their strong vocals combined with a slightly creepier sound. If you're not a fan of TGS, then Juujika isn't a departure from their mature sound and probably won't win you over. For me though, I like the sound of Juujika, although it does a feel a little long at parts. I think maybe the verses could have been arranged to sound a little bit creepier. Maybe they could have changed the key of the song to a minor tone. Actually, that might work really well. Humming Juujika a key higher, and hoo boy, it sounds even creepier. A key change like that in the song would have been so nice... Still, in its current form, I think Juujika is a strong A-side. Maybe not one of the strongest one in Tokyo Girls' Style's overall discography, but it still has a distinct sound and everything that I like in a TGS song. I even think Juujika is one of my favorite A-sides that TGS has released this era and a decent A-side to close the era with. Juujika especially is a refreshing listen after the 90s funk-heavy Partition Love and the abysmally bland Chiisana Kiseki. But I do wonder how TGS's upcoming album, Killing Me Softly, is going to sound like quite the clusterfuck of different-sounding A-sides.

While the song may not be as scary as it could have been, the real scares should come from a music video. A proper concept and imagery can make even the most benevolent songs sound terrifying (example: Singin' in the Rain). So turn off your lights and lock the doors, because we're about to look at a spoooooky PV.


First shot in and all I have to say is damn, that's one long white dress. Is Hitomi getting married?


Yuri chained to a tree petting a fake animal... I may need some context.


Oh my goodness, they're all chained to trees. What the heck is going on!?


Oh hey, Hitomi's doing the thing from the trailer! I wonder what she sees through-


EEK!


Wow, TGS formed a Catholic gang! They really are pushing idol boundaries!


It's not a TGS PV until the members start embracing each other!


Man, this is like something out of The Haunted Mansion.


Perhaps Ayano is praying that one day TGS will become popular.


Well fiddle-dee-dee I think this PV has something to do with crosses. Just a hunch.


Oh my... those costumes are very... lacy... and see-through...


...I don't remember learning about this crucifixion in Sunday school.


Hitomi, I think it's gonna take more than a tug to break that chain.


So uh, anyone care to point out the elephant in the room- or should I say minotaur in the room?


Damn, why is everyone in TGS so good at being uncomfortably hot?


I mean seriously, the producers are really piling on the fanservice in this PV.


The sexy black dresses, the innocent Lolita dresses, the handcuffs, what's next, blood!?


...I shouldn't have said anything.


So where ya headed, Hitomi?


Well, while she's doing that, Miyu's doing vague, but pretty, metaphoric things.


Mmmm~ I love when idols do this dance move. It looks so crisp and sharp.


Oh look, the minotaur showed back up! And yikes, what's he doing with Ayano?


Bye bye, Ayano! Off into the darkness she goes! Forever!!!


This scenario just screams, "GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN" all over it.


Hey, the badass capes came back! All right!


And TGS strikes one final pose to show off those... interesting dresses.


Hitomi looks awful happy to see...


Hitomi!?


There are televisions series devoted to why this shouldn't happen.


See, you mess with the laws of nature and you disintegrate! Let this be a lesson to all you occult seekers.

All right, who wants to talk about sacrilegious music videos? I do! The music video for Juujika has gone under a teensy-tiny bit of controversy because of its use of crosses and crucifixion. Not a lot of controversy, but just enough for me to notice. The main controversy has stemmed from the accusation that the PV's use of crosses and crucifixion is insensitive or exploitative to Christianity. And as a mildly religious person, what do I have to say about this supposedly sacrilegious music video? Well, I'll have you know right that... I don't care. I mean, have you people seen a Madonna music video? Tons of music videos use crosses, churches, crucifixion, and so many other motifs of Christianity in them to much more profane degrees than what Tokyo Girls' Style is doing in this music video. I can see why if you're really religious, it would be uncomfortable, but to me, this is tame and not really worth any of this alleged "controversy." I mean the title of the song translates to cross, what else were they supposed to put in the music video!? If you disagree and still find this PV sacrilegious, that is okay. I understand and am not gonna force you to agree with me. Okay, I've addressed the elephant in the room, now let's move on and talk about the actual music video.

Honestly, I love this music video. I think it's got a lot of striking, vivid imagery, especially in comparison to their last few music videos. While Tokyo Girls Style's past few PVs haven't been awful, they've all been a little... low budget. The last really fancy TGS PV I watched was Unmei. Get the Star was nice-looking but didn't have much variety, ditto for Chiisana Kiseki, and Partition Love was a cheap grab for attention that I don't even want to talk about. Juujika blows all three of those PVs out of the water. This PV looks beautiful, hauntingly beautiful. And there's such a great scope in this video. I mean, the girls are dancing colossal church with these giant neon crosses in the background. The aesthetic of Juujika reminded me of the artwork for Arcade Fire's Neon Bible album. The colors are all so rich, from the blood red and dark blue in the close-ups to the blinding green and sharp black of the dance shot. And all the locations are just stunning to look at. I love seeing the church from a bunch of different angles and not just in that one dance shot. Juujika isn't an overtly scary PV like BiS's Idol or Bellring Shoujo Heart's Circus & Renai Soudan, but it's glamorous in the same way the horror film Suspiria is.

So does Juujika's PV mean anything or is it all just a bunch of pretty sets and costumes? I'd be willing to bet the latter considering most idol PVs tend to be style over substance. But it's still a pretty PV. And I think that at least a little bit of the PV is referencing the Gakkou no Kaidan -Noroi no Kotodama- movie. Like at the beginning Hitomi makes that hand motion where it looks like she's peering through a window, the same motion that I saw in the trailer (and on one of the covers for the single). And I guess the rest of the PV is kind of spiritual? There is that minotaur spirit/monster that randomly shows up at parts in the PV. In fact, I think I've seen that in another PV as well... Mizuki Nana's Eternal Blaze! Is that just a popular monster to feature in Japanese music videos? There's also the contrast between the two outfits the girls wear in Juujika, one being the innocent, white Lolita-style dresses and the black, sexier lace dresses that would look more like swimsuits if they didn't have the lace over them. I think one of the main themes of the PV was the clash of the "light" and "dark" personas of Tokyo Girls' Style and how one can't exist while the other does. I mean, at the end of the PV, it looks like Hitomi's white persona got possessed/devoured by the black persona. You know, symbolism!

I'd think the more controversial part of this PV would be how revealing those black dresses are, not the religious imagery. I'm serious, they're very revealing, even for TGS. I guess it's a little more okay for them now because they're no longer 11-13 but still, the girls' ages now are only 16-17. Even beyond just the sexy black dresses, there's a lot of suggestive elements to this PV. They're not as trashy as that other TGS PV I reviewed before Juujika, but it's still very mature for 16-17 idols. The PV shows the girls in handcuffs, restrained to crosses, wearing black lace, Lolita dresses, the whole nine yards! Sometimes I wonder what the parents of the TGS idols think of their daughters doing PVs like this. I have to admit though, the girls work it really well, like they always do in their more sensual PVs. I'm still not completely sure how TGS pulls that off. And I think the presentation of Juujika makes it slightly less icky than it could have been. I mean, there aren't as many pandering otaku shots than a PV like say, Limited addition. Heck compared to Limited addiction, Juujika is downright tame. Still, this is pretty mature, suggestive, and sensual PV, even for TGS, and if you're squicked out by it, that is completely okay and probably means that you're at least a slightly normal person.

Even with its more questionable creative decisions, I still think the PV for Juujika is awesome. I've watched several times not even to review it, but because it's just a captivating PV to watch. There isn't a story or any real meaning to it, but the presentation is what grabs me. All the creative choices are utilized perfectly, and the final product looks very complete. I now there's controversy over Juujika being "sacrilegious" or not, but either way, it is still a stunning PV. And I didn't really mention the dance, but the choreography matches the song so well. Every movement is so deliberate and intense! And beyond that, there is such a great variety of different shots and areas. The song isn't one of my favorite TGS songs, but I think the PV for Juujika is one of the best TGS PVs that I've seen in awhile. And even with all the weird, slightly spooky stuff in it, this PV still feels like a TGS PV. It's nice seeing Tokyo Girls' Style go down a more spooky route, even if right now isn't the best time to do a spooky PV. I'm just saying that this would have been a great Halloween PV. With all the summer PVs I'm gonna start reviewing this summer, Juujika stands out (much like last year's Unmei) as a dark, almost gothic music video that showcases just how cool Tokyo Girls' Style's PVs can get. I highly recommend watching this PV.


I think I'll settle on four and half apples for Juujika. Even though October is still five months away, Juujika is a creepy song with the polished maturity of other TGS songs. The PV is where the song really shines though. If you're not offended by religious symbols being used for sheer aesthetic, then I would highly recommend checking this PV out. It's sleek, gorgeously shot, and another great, memorable PV for Tokyo Girls' Style. Now I eagerly await Killing Me Softly.

I don't know what it is about reviewing TGS's latest PV that's got me going on all these morbid puns! But oh well, this is Bellring Shoujo Heart's Killer Killer EP!


Bellring Shoujo Heart sure likes their extended plays, don't they? This is like the 5th EP they've released! Well, as long as those EPs have good music on them, I'm perfectly happy! As I have expressed in the past, Bellring Shoujo Heart is a group that I'd like to get more into. They've got cool music and a weird, unconventional image, much like BiS if BiS were inspired by 1960s rock and alternative. And some of their music can get so delightfully creepy! I can't wait until October comes around; then I'll really feel like listening to Bellring Shoujo Heart. Anyways, this is their latest single, Killer Killer EP. As none of the songs have PVs (that I know of), I've opted to review the entire single. And why not review the whole single? Killer Killer EP's has got three songs on it that are all worth talking about! So keep your eyes above the ground, because we are going six feet under into Bellring Shoujo Heart's Killer Killer EP!

Covers/Outfits

Killer Killer EP's cover isn't quite as colorful as Untouchable EP's was. But I like the black/white/red color scheme and the way the girls are posed too. They look like they're reaching toward the camera like zombies! All they need is some fake blood and they can re-enact Night of the Living Dead! I noticed that Bellring Shoujo Heart has six members. Or is it seven? I know they have one international member who's having trouble securing a visa. I guess she couldn't make it for the jacket shooting of this cover. Well, everyone else looks adorable. In fact, I've noticed Bellring Shoujo Heart has a tendency to look very adorable, even when they're performing they're creepier/weirder songs. I have to say, it kind of works. It works on the cover for Killer Killer EP at least!

Crimson Horizon

The first song on Killer Killer EP is a song that's pretty much what you'd expect from Shoujo Heart. It's alternative rock that sounds like it's from the sixties, bad vocal production and all! Crimson Horizon was the song on Killer Killer EP that took the longest to grow on me. I didn't think it was a terrible song when I first heard it, but I did feel like I'd heard it in other Bellring Shoujo Heart songs before. And I probably have. Crimson Horizon reminds me most of Bokura no Wednesday and yOU Rari from their Bedhead album. Luckily though, Crimson Horizon isn't a carbon copy of either song. And I actually think the production quality is a little better on Crimson Horizon than it's been on other songs! I don't have the ear for sound mixing as well as other people do, but when the girls sing individually, they sound clearer. Then they sing together, and that fuzzy vocal quality comes back. I think that may have to do partially with the way they're singing though. I wonder if that's how sixties girl bands sang. Sixties girl bands were a thing, right? I hope so. I know that there's one girl band that was formed that was so terrible that they became ironically good. Wouldn't it be something if Bellring Shoujo Heart paid an homage to that band?

Back to Crimson Horizon, I think it's a good song. Not my favorite from Bellring Shoujo Heart, but it has a cool melody, especially in the chorus. Some of those high notes are a little too strained for my liking, but that's the price you pay when you get into idol music. Crimson Horizon shows how remarkably consistent Bellring Shoujo Heart is with their sound. Even though it sounds similar to a few of their other songs, it's still enjoyable. And for me, a song can sound similar to another song as long as both songs are good. And with BiS disbanding, I find that I'm slowly gravitating toward Bellring Shoujo Heart. I think it's some sort of coping mechanism. Admittedly, I can't think of much else to say about Crimson Horizon. If you don't like Bellring Shoujo Heart, then this song isn't going to win you over. But if you are curious about their general sound, then Crimson Horizon may be a good starter. It perfectly captures the messy psychedelic rock sound of the sixties that Bellring Shoujo Heart emanates so well. I think Crimson Heart grows on you the more you listen to it, and the sound becomes more memorable. Even if you can't bring yourself to like this song, you've gotta admit that is one killer song name. It sounds like a nail polish or a horror movie.



Despite the awesome name, I think I'll still give Crimson Horizon 4 apples. It's a good song, but not the greatest I've heard from Bellring Shoujo Heart. That doesn't mean I won't listen to it in the future! It's a pretty fun sixties-style song. It could have been a little trippier though!

Plastic 21g

After the slightly lackluster Crimson Horizon, Plastic 21g grabbed me with that opening riff. And then the girls started singing, and Plastic 21g held my attention with an iron fist. I think what I love most about Plastic 21g is that it has a very interesting vocal structure. The song is in minor key, and the way the girls sing is slightly creepy. Not super creepy though, but I think if you rearranged the instrumental, Plastic 21g has the potential to be unleaded nightmare fuel. The vocals also have some very catchy hooks, especially in the chorus. The way the girls hold out those end notes just makes them stick in your head somehow. The vocals aren't the only interesting thing about Plastic 21g though; the instrumental is really neat too. There are a lot of different sounds and instruments that the producer dabbled into with Plastic 21g. There's the usual psychedelic guitars and drums that creep into every Bellring Shoujo Heart song, but I also hear a lot of different percussion like a xylophone to some softer instruments as well. And then at the end of the song, this random male voice gets sampled! I'm not sure whose it is or what language it's in. It kind of sounds like it was taken from an old Western film, but I could very well be wrong. Maybe it's Bellring Shoujo Heart's producer!

I will admit I'm a little split on the sampling at the end, but I think it's grown on me over time. It's just when the first time you hear those deeper vocals, it comes off as a bit of a shock. But I like the build-up towards the end of Plastic 21g. As the song progresses, you get more and more different sounds and samples. The final result is something that is a little bit clustered but nonetheless interesting. I guess my one complaint about Plastic 21g would be that at parts, it does feel like there's a little too much going on in it. But Plastic 21g mostly remains messy in a way that works. At the end of the day, too much instrumentation doesn't take away from my enjoyment of Plastic 21g. It could be a music producer's dream or nightmare, but to me, it makes the song cool. I actually wonder which song will get a music video (if any of them) off of Killer Killer EP. I'd actually like if Plastic 21g was the song that got a music video. I think the song is crazy enough that a crazy, random music video would match perfectly with the song. I mean, c.a.n.d.y. got a music video even though it wasn't the first song off of Untouchable EP so who knows? I can hope for Plastic 21g! Even if it remains PV-less, Plastic 21g is still a pretty awesome song, even if it's a bit overwhelming at times.



I was caught between 5 and 4.5 for Plastic 21g, but I did end up going with 4.5 It's a great song, it really is, but as I said before, there are a few parts that could have been cleaned up. But as always, I am all for experimentation in idol music and the experimental sound of Plastic 21g is highly entertaining to listen to.

kUMA GOQLI

Okay, did Bellring Shoujo Heart's producer just mash a bunch keys together and say, "Okay, that sounds like a cool title!" and call it a day? Because I don't think kUMA GOQLI is a real word in English or any other language. How would you even pronounce that??? Well, after the two energetic songs on this EP, kUMA GOQLI calms things down. I wouldn't say this song's a ballad, but it's a very chill song. It kind of reminds me of The Velvet Underground's Sunday Morning. But kUMA GOQLI is nowhere near as chill as Sunday Morning. Many songs aren't. I was actually thinking that kUMA GOQLI was going to speed up and get noisier and more energetic toward the middle. But for the most part, the song retained its laid-back atmosphere. There's a brief crescendo in the bridge, but it's not much of an increase. I actually like having this song last on Killer Killer EP, since it's like the denouement after the rising action and climax in a story. kUMA GOQLI is a short song, but I feel like the length is just right. I'm glad the producer didn't decide to drag the song out and make it a full ballad; I think that would have made the song lose some replay value.

There's some cool stuff done in this song too! For instance, something I liked was the producer mixed a lot of chatter from the girls of Bellring Shoujo Heart into this song and even a little bit of laughter. It should have come off as very creepy, but it's actually kind of calming. It sounds very much like normal chatter from teenage girls to my ears, but maybe it means something creepy in Japanese. Who knows? They just sound so soft and relaxed, it makes for a very relaxing effect. The producer was also rocking that theremin in the song, which again, should have made the song sound creepier. Like many other Bellring Shoujo Heart songs, kUMA GOQLI sounds like it belongs in the sixties. Probably the drug side of the sixties, I could see counterculture hippies high on pot listening to this song. Vivid image I know but still, I could! Luckily, I don't need narcotics to enjoy kUMA GOQLI. It's another effortlessly cool Bellring Shoujo Heart song. What makes kUMA GOQLI stand out is that it is such a calm song, coming after the two more hectic songs on Killer Killer EP. I guess I could say that kUMA GOQLI kills those two other songs that closes the coffin on this single. And also closes the coffin on my puns, because that was terrible.



Yeah, I'll give the final song on Killer Killer EP 5 apples. Despite the short length, kUMA GOQLI is a cool, chill song that you should listen to if you wanna chill. And that's pretty much the last I can say about it, now let's see how all three of these songs hold up together!

The Verdict

So are you guys still alive? If so, I'm disappointed! That was not what Killer Killer EP was supposed to do! Whether Killer Killer EP is as killer as the title lets on, I enjoyed this single! Probably a bit more than I did Untouchable EP (although I liked that single too!). I'm glad that Bellring Shoujo Heart's producer decided not to included another remix on this single. I like having entirely new content much better! The three songs that were included on Killer Killer EP I all liked to varying degrees. Crimson Horizon was the weakest song on the album, but even then, that was still a pretty good song that stayed true to Bellring Shoujo Heart's sound. Plastic 21g was definitely the funkiest of the three singles and tried a lot of different sounds. Those sounds didn't always work, but they did leave a lasting impression. And then kUMA GOQLI was the perfect song to close the EP, a nice combination of trippy and soothing. I think what I like most about Killer Killer EP is the contrast between these three songs. They all sound so different from each other. If you want to listen to a slow song, there's kUMA GOQLI. If you want something weirder and more experimental, there's Plastic 21g. And if you just want traditional Bellring Shoujo Heart, there's Crimson Horizon.

This single has such a great variety of sounds and styles that stay true to Bellring Shoujo Heart's musical style. So overall, I am mostly pleased with Killer Killer EP. It's a strong consistent single that'll leave you dying for more Bellring Shoujo Heart music. If you like there style, that is. Like with all their other music, their production quality can be a little... off-putting to a new listener. There production isn't polished like a lot of other idol groups, even the more unconventional ones. It's very messy and that can be a turn-off for some fans. For me though, it's grown on me, and I'm okay with it. Killer Killer EP has all the sixties sounds combined with idols that make me enjoy Bellring Shoujo Heart so much. It marks another consistent, highly enjoyable, and interesting release from Bellring Shoujo Heart as well! I do wonder when the group will release their next album. As of now, they've released two singles since Bedhead. I could see them releasing one more single than making an album. Whenever that is, I'll be waiting and trying my best to keep up with their releases. I think with BiS's disbandment date growing closer and closer, I've been gravitating to Bellring Shoujo Heart more.


Even on their own though, Bellring Shoujo Heart still stands as an interesting, unconventional idol group! So I think I'll give Killer Killer EP 4.5 apples. 4.5 apples to die for. Seriously, for all you know, I poisoned those virtual apples. But don't let that deter you from checking out Bellring Shoujo Heart's latest single, especially if you're into BiS. It's like listening to an idol group if it came from the sixties in the form of a girl band. Seriously, can sixties girl bands be more a thing in modern media please?

I've been meaning to review AKB48's latest PV, but I've just been putting and putting it off. Now with the recent attack on Kawaei Rina and Iriyama Anna and a staff member at a handshake event... I'd really rather not be reviewing the PV for Labrador Retriever.

But I have to.


And no, my reservations do not stem from two members getting attacked with a 20 inch hand saw. Speaking of that, I was just as surprised as other people about the attack... and yet at the same time I'm not. What really surprises me is that for such a famous group, something of this nature took so long to happen. As famous as AKB48 has gotten, I haven't really heard about any threats or harassment from their fans, or even people who aren't fans. I'm certain there are loons out there (that is a universal with any artist, idol or not) but never any that tried to physically attack any of the members. Well... until now. I haven't written about the attack, because there's really nothing that I feel like I can say. Other bloggers have expressed my sentiments. The only thing I really have to say about this entire incident is that I hope Rina and Anna and the unnamed staff member are going to be mentally okay. I know they'll physically recover, but someone personally attacking you is a very traumatic event. And I wonder how this will effect future events with AKB48 or even the relationship between AKB48 and its fans now. The attack burst that bubble of security and trust between the idols and fans, and I don't think that can ever be re-established again.

Now. As I was saying, I have been procrastinating on my review for Labrador Retriever. Why? Because I can't do it. I can't give AKB48's newest single my time and effort to review. It doesn't deserve it. Besides, you all know what I'm going to say. It's the same thing I've been saying about every other A-side they've released since 2012. And I'm tired. The passionate rage I've had for their recent A-sides and how awful they've been is just about gone. And all that's left is the exhaustion of writing the same thing over and over again. It feels more like an obligation than it does something I want to do. I mean, I could be writing about a group that I really like right now, or even an editorial that I've been wanting to finish these past few months. But no, I have to review effing Labrador Retriever, a song so bad it doesn't deserve my time. Bad songs can be fun to review. Hello Kitty by Avril Lavigne is a horrendous song, but it is such fun to talk about because it's bad in the most garish way possible. When something's bad, disappointingly bad, it's not fun to review. AKB48's A-sides for the past two years, with the exception of Mae Shika Mukanee and maybe UZA, have been disappointingly bad. And I just can't sit here and say the same thing I've said for all those bad singles again.

So I think... I'm gonna put AKB48 on the Idol Blacklist.

I'm not just sick of AKB48's music, I'm sick of AKB48, and no amount of waxing poetic about their good songs of the past can cure that. I have nothing against girls, and I respect how hard they work for such an exploitative management. In fact, it's AKS that I have more disdain for and all their pandering, desperate methods to juice more revenue, even at the cost of the well-being/safety/self esteem/health of the girls they're managing. I'm sick of the elections, the tournaments, the debate over "who should be center!?!?", everything with AKB48. And when you can't stand something, I've learned the best thing to do is just drop it. I don't want to use my words to waste time on something that's just going to give me grief when I could use that same energy to write about something I actually like. I'll still include AKB48's older releases in the Time Capsule Review pulls, but after Labrador Retriever, I don't plan on reviewing any of their future songs or music videos or discussing any Senbatsu news. I'll review Nogizaka46's and maybe NMB48's or SKE48's if they're good but no more AKB48. Because it's just the same thing with each new release and I am so, so burnt out on reviewing AKB48. But I did promise one last AKB48 review, so let's get this over with.

The only way I can find Labrador Retriever to be a decent song is by comparing it to all the other terrible A-sides AKB48's been releasing these past two years. So on that scale of terrible, Labrador Retriever just ranks as the least terrible. And that is pretty much all you need to know about this song. If you actually liked Gingham Check, Eien Pressure, So Long!, Sayonara Crawl, and Suzukake Nanchara (and apparently, there are people who do), then you will like Labrador Retriever. I do not. Yet I can't even hate this song, because this song may as well be a bag of air. There is nothing to it. Labrador Retriever is a song that lacks anything good; it is four minutes of nothingness. You may as well be listening to wind, because that's pretty much the same effect you'll have listening to Labrador Retriever. And yet I know that people will still by this four minutes of nothingness that calls itself a song; in fact, over 1 million people already have. Obviously, it's just for the Senbatsu election, and even then, I highly doubt many people buy AKB48 singles for the song quality. All right, I got nothing else on Labrador Retriever. It's a lifeless song that I intend on forgetting very soon.

Okay, time to screencap the PV. Yay. I can hardly wait. Let's just get this over with.


The PV starts off with a woman pouring dog food. How promising.


Meanwhile, Mayu's in bed, dreaming of when AKB48 had better music.


There's the titular Labrador Retriever. Luckily, I'm a dog person.


And here's the dance shot that looks exactly like AKB48's last two summer dance shots only with different bathing suits. Joy.


Oh boy, I wonder which three members will win top three in the Senbatsu Election.


What a clever and subtle way of projecting fanservice to the audience.


Shots of idols having fun doing summer activities. How nice.


More summer activities. Whoop-dee-freaking-doo.


Well to be fair, they're having more fun than I am right now.


I love how no one's ever in sync in AKB48's summer music videos.


The lab is back. No doubt to beg for hot dogs.


Oh my god, it's been two minutes, and she's still pouring that dog food!?


I know AKB's idols advertise a lot of products but dog food? Really???


That's a fancy collar for a dog.


I guess Mayu and her dog have matching necklaces? That's not completely implausible.


Some A+ choreography going on back there. It puts Perfume's to shame.


Ew ew ew NO. I don't even let other people lick my ice cream, why would you let a dog!?


Why would you like it afterward!? That is unsanitary on so many levels.


God, I've seen the "idols in the back of a truck" in so many summer PVs by now that it's probably a trope.


I don't care how cute the dog is, it doesn't save the PV.


Although I will admit I chuckled at this one part. Just this one part.


Ack! I'm getting war flashbacks to Yurushite Nyan!


I guess they're all gonna follow the lab becuase... the plot demands it?


Wait a minute. What's going on?


Did they... all just turn into dogs?


WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!?


This is stupid. This so, so stupid.


And no amount of cute doggies can't not make this stupid.


This is the worst plot twist ever.


And then Mayu barks at the end because... because fuck dignity, that's why!

I probably could have picked a better summer PV to kick off idol summer with, but I didn't want an AKB48 PV to be my 100th PV review. That being said... what the fuck did I just watch? I mean really, what was that? Is this PV saying that the members of AKB48 are dogs? Why did Mayu bark at the end? Why did the producers take the simplest concept and turn it into the weirdest, most awkward AKB48 PV I've reviewed? I guess I can say that the PV is... memorable. And different. And not your average summer PV. But honestly, I would have taken a generic summer PV over this, because this PV is just ridiculous. And not the fun kind of ridiculous. The song is called Labrador Retriever, so I figured that yes, there would be a labrador retriever in the PV. And having other dogs in the PV is also nice. I love dogs. Dogs are wonderful. I have a dog. But... this PV is so stupid. The conclusion is absolutely stupid, and makes everything building up to it even stupider. Why couldn't the girls have just danced with the dogs and call it a day? Why did they have to show the girls pretending to be dogs and licking/barking/sniffing/doing other dog things with their other selves?

I have reviewed some weird PVs, and they tend to fall into two categories: weird in a fun way or too weird to actually enjoy. Labrador Retriever's PV falls into that category. The creative decisions made with this PV baffle me. I want to know who thought this entire PV was a good idea and why, because I am at a loss for theories. I guess logic was that everyone loves dogs and wotas love idols in bikinis so why not combine them both as some mass-marketing ploy? I mean, does it even really matter what creative concept behind the summer PV was? Does anyone of AKB48's intended demographic really care about that? Well, I know that I do not care about this PV. I still think it's an awful, strange PV that makes zero sense concept-wise. Nonetheless, I don't care about this PV. I'm going to forget about it the moment I hit publish on this post. Because while Labrador Retriever is weird, it's still too boring to be memorably weird. Sort of how AKB48's music sucks but it's still to boring to be memorably suckish. All right, I think I'm gonna wrap the review up here. There is literally nothing else I can say about the PV for Labrador Retriever, and I'm ready to get this review over with. My final verdict is this PV is dog shit, and the only reason to watch it is if you're really itching to see your oshimen in a bikini.


One apple and only because I have a soft spot for dogs. Other than that, I do not give a shit about Labrador Retriever, and I'm glad to be done with it. Welcome to the Blacklist, AKB48. Enjoy your stay, because it looks like you're going to be on it for a long, long time.

God, I'm gonna freaking cry. I can't believe this is the last BiS PV I'll ever get to review.


Unless the new version of Nerve gets a PV as well. Which would be nice. I suppose I can still include BiS's material in Time Capsule Reviews, but it won't be the same as reviewing new songs and music videos. Well, at least they're going out in true BiS fashion, by satirizing the long-established summer single! I mean, look at the cover, it's clearly a parody of AKB48's Manatsu no Sounds good! covers. But that's just one of the many elements of Final Dance that pokes fun at idol summer singles! Ah, idol summer. You're all familiar with what I'm talking about, right? The time of year when idol groups released summer themed singles full of music videos of dancing on the beach, fruity nonalcoholic drinks, and shameless fanservice! It's a not-so-long-standing tradition in the idol industry, and idol summer releases can range from being entertaining music videos that emphasize the best aspects of summer... or absolute pieces of trash. For instance, the previous summer PV I reviewed this year is one of those unfortunate summer PVs that doesn't work at all. But let's not broach that piece of dog poop again. Now it's Brand-new Idol Society's time to shine! Even if this is the last time...

I will admit, I was a little taken aback when I first heard Final Dance. I was also watching the music video though, and it's a little difficult trying to take in a music video and the song at once then trying to generate an opinion of one or the other. Listening to just the song, I can say that Final Dance is definitely... not quite was I was expecting as the final BiS song. Okay, yes, there's also nerve but that's a re-record that I'll talk about in the single review. Then again, I'm not sure what I was expecting for BiS's final single. Would it be something strange and unconventional? Or something more traditional-sounding with a more subtle twist of unconventionality to it? I mean, their last single before this one was StupiG, and that was just about their strangest A-side I've heard. Final Dance sounds like a conventional idol summer song twisted into a BiS summer song. The way the vocals are structured reminds me very much of one of AKB48's summer songs, but the instrumentals on top of it are thankfully a lot more bombastic and interesting than any of AKB48's recent summer songs. Still, I'm curious to hear the acappella version of Final Dance. I get the feeling it'll sound a little more conventional than some of BiS's other songs.

Final Dance has grown on me a lot since I first heard it. I think it's a nice blend of BiS's crazier, over-the-top sound and the more pop side of their music. And I admit, in perspective it's kind of nice having something a little more straightforward from BiS as their last new song. I mean, StupiG was a batshit crazy song, and a lot of their recent songs have just been crazier than they were when BiS started out. But with Final Dance, it feels like BiS is embracing the idol sound and then bending that ever-so-slight to fit their own unconventional sound. Final Dance is a pop song at its core, but it's the kind of pop song that BiS would do. And I think what also makes Final Dance a good song is that there's a lot of emotion in it. I know that's kind of a silly thing for me to say. I mean, how can I possibly tell that when I can't even speak Japanese? I think it has to do with the way the girls sing it. They just sound like they're giving it all, as though this is the last new song that they'll ever record. I wonder what went on in the studio when BiS recorded this song. Were the girls emotional? Even if they were faking it, Final Dance still sounds like an earnest goodbye song.

Of course, that could be because it is a goodbye song. Final Dance is half of the last single that BiS will ever release. And listening to it, I feel kind of sad. I mean, this is the final song before the curtain drops. I think at least part of me seeing Final Dance as emotional farewell stems from my own emotions regarding BiS's upcoming disbandment. I haven't really talked about BiS disbanding, because I've just kind of hoped that the news would go away. But I don't think it is, and if Final Dance is going to be the big finish for BiS, I think it works. I do think they might have been able to do something a little less summery, but as far as summer songs go, this one's the bomb. PPCC is still my favorite BiS summer song, but Final Dance isn't half bad either. It has just enough style and emotion to avoid the pitfalls of many idol summer songs, and I think as the years go by, nostalgia will definitely kick in with Final Dance. I mean, it will with all of BiS's songs; I can just feel it. Final Dance wasn't quite the type of song I expected BiS to go out with, but in my opinion, they pull it off well. And isn't it fitting that they go out with a more idol-oriented song. Their goal from the start has always been to satirize idol groups, so the summery pop rock sound of Final Dance is both poignant and fitting.

But that's just the song. No way does BiS's satire of the idol summer single stop with the song. No, it wouldn't be a satire if you didn't satirize the idol summer PV. So is Final Dance's PV a clever satire or does it fall flat on its face harder than Ayaman Japan's Poi Poi? As long as it doesn't have harassment and childish sexual innuendos left and right, I think I'll survive.


This wouldn't be an idol summer PV without the bikinis!


Okay, Round 1 of Guess the Reference! Can you guess what shot this satires?


It's the same as the aerial shots used in AKB48's Ponytail to Shushu!


And look, the iconic spiked baseball bats. How I'll miss them.


I've seen this pose and glittery backdrop in so many idol PVs I can't even list them all!


Ditto for this pose.


It's actually ironically refreshing to see BiS wearing such normal clothes. Especially Tenten. I hope she goes places after BiS.


The dance is simple to the point of hilarity. Look at all those different poses!


Time for Round 2 of Guess the Reference! Can you guess what this is referencing?


Super Girls' Puripuri♥Summer Kiss! Of course I'm sure Super Girls copied it from some other idol group.


I know it's meant to be satire, but everyone just looks so nice!


I hope Uika goes places too.


Oh, look it's DiE. That was one hell of a PV. Ah, good times...


And BiSimulation! Also very good times... weird times... but good times...


I'm not sure if this is idol-y or BiS-y.


Aw, it's Mitchel. I hope she found a job somewhere.


Look, it's early BiS! That was their first PV ever!


Man, the lineup has changed so much in four years...


Dammit, this PV's making me nostalgic. And sad. Stop that, PV!


...I'm gonna miss BiS.


See? Even the members of BiS look like they're gonna miss BiS!


My Ixxx was the first BiS PV I ever saw. I guess it fits that it's in one of the last PVs.


I think my biggest regret will be not being able to go to a BiS concert.


Idol. Wouldn't it have been awesome if they included the joke Idol PV in Final Dance?


The spiked baseball bats. I'm gonna miss those too. I'm gonna miss... so much...


Oh hey, look at Uika making fun of idol summer poses!


Don't focus on BiS disbanding... don't... focus...


Oh god, it's really happening. They're disbanding.


No more PVs. Or songs. Or concerts. It'll all just... end like that.


Gosh darn it, they've come so far. I don't want them to stop now.


Oh well, I guess they'd have to disband eventually-


Annnnd the bats fell down. I think I need to lie down.

You may think that last shot is of the ocean, but really it's all my tears. You know what's so awful about this PV? It sucks you into thinking it's just going to be another BiS-style parody of other idol PVs, but then halfway through it punches you in the stomach with clips from all their past PVs. Do not watch this PV. Actually, do watch. Or don't. You probably shouldn't listen to me, I'm kind of just now realizing that BiS will be gone after July 8. Honestly, I never pegged BiS to be the first idol group I reviewed to disband. I always thought it'd be... well, I didn't know, but I didn't think BiS would be the first. Technically, Bump.y is also disbanding, but I'm only a casual fan of them. I've been a fan of BiS since My Ixxx. I may not have been there at the very beginning, but I still followed BiS through lineup changes, switching to a major label, singles and albums, the 100k marathon, the failed Budokan pursuit, so many things. And one of my favorite aspects of BiS has always been their music videos. Sure, sometimes they could get graphic or inappropriate or downright uncomfortable, but they were always so interesting. And for better or worse, they grabbed my attention! If My Ixxx hadn't been such a controversial PV, I may have never even discovered BiS.

I bring this all up, because I think to really appreciate the PV for Final Dance, you have to do two things. First,you need to be a fan of BiS. The longer the fan, the better, but if you're looking to become a fan of BiS, just start watching their music videos. They're on Youtube. And Jpopsuki. And then try finding their albums, along with their singles. Once you've done that then the PV for Final Dance will be all the more wonderful and soul-crushing. Second, you need to know the formula for the idol summer PV. Otherwise, this music video is just going to look like a group of girls prancing around in bikinis. Final Dance combines the traditional idol summer PV concept with clips from previous BiS music videos and concerts. In doing so, Final Dance is just about as close as BiS has come to really satirizing an idol PV while at the same time being a painful yet heartwarming trip down the group's history, from the very first rendition of Nerve all the way to StupiG. I was so surprised when the clips started showing up halfway through Final Dance. It was very disorienting, and when I saw all those BiS clips jammed together in one PV, it really hit me that this truly is the final dance for BiS. And that makes me very sad.

Final Dance could have worked as just a parody summer PV. It's set up perfectly to be one. I laughed when I saw the girls dancing around in colorful bikinis, doing all those dance poses, and generally normal idol summer things. In a weird way, it was even kind of refreshing. When BiS does so many abnormal things for idols, the weirdest thing that they can do turns into the most normal thing a conventional idol group can do. And the satire works so well, to the point that it's almost subtle. There are so many summer PVs that BiS is satirizing in this PV, to the point where I can't even name them all. That's partially because Final Dance is a satire of so many general concepts in idol summer PVs that it's hard to peg down specific music videos. That's why you need to be familiar with the idol summer PV. Anyways, BiS could have just left Final Dance as a fun parody, but then they twisted that into a chance to play back all their past releases. And I love that they covered pretty much everything, even their indie releases like My Ixxx and Idol. Although I'd like to take this moment to say, I never saw Yufu once in any of those clips. I can only imagine why. Still, Final Dance is such a frustratingly poignant PV and makes for a fitting last music video from BiS...

...if it is their last music video.

I'm certain you all noticed the "to be continued..." in my very last screencap. I think that may indicate a PV for the Final Version of Nerve, the other A-side off of this single. I'm not sure though, since no PV has been released on the Avex Youtube channel. The only music video on the DVD versions of the single is Final Dance. But there was also a tweet about another PV, so by this point, I have no expectations. If a final PV comes, I welcome it with open arms. But if Final Dance is meant to be a send off for BiS, then I think it works pretty well. I'm a little unsure about the decision to make it a summer PV, but Final Dance/nerve is a summer single. And I think it kind of fits with BiS's entire concept. Watching Final Dance has made me realize how much I'm gonna miss BiS and how much I don't want to see them go yet. I guess it's better for them to go out with a bang like Final Dance than something mediocre, right? Still, part of me says it feels too early. But then another part of me says that it's time for BiS to go. Pour Lui wants them to go out before they start to decline, and if that's what she wants, so be it. But it still hurts. I wish all the best to the former and current members of BiS. They're leaving us in true BiS fashion, with a satisfying conclusion to the four years of running around nude, spiked baseball bats, and fake blood. How I will miss it.


Final Dance isn't perfect, but it is near-perfect. Four and half apples near-perfect. The song is a little tame for BiS, but still has all the energy and heart to make for a strong sendoff. The PV is heavily nostalgic, especially if you've been a fan of BiS for some time. Even if not, Final Dance still makes for a great music video that's both a great satire of summer PVs and a bittersweet retrospective of everything BiS has accomplished. All I can ask of you readers is that you please check out BiS. They're a wonderful group, and I hope that after they've disbanded, they'll still carry on as a legacy.

The most popular release on the Time Capsule Review poll turned out to be... something by Perfume! Good, that either means I have lots of Perfume fans reading this blog, or I'm slowly but surely converting all of you to Perfume fans. Either way, May's Time Capsule Review is Laser Beam/Kasuka na Kaori, originally released May 18, 2011! Wow, that was over three years ago... it's crazy to think how much time has gone by since then.


And just to clarify, yes, I will be reviewing both PVs off this single. I thought about reviewing just one or the other, but when it came down to it, I realized I could talk about a lot of stuff with both the A-sides off this single! But let's start with Laser Beam, the first of the two A-sides! Ah, I remember when Perfume announced this song like it was yesterday. I remember feeling so excited for it, as I do with every Perfume single, and the wait for it being particularly excruciating. Not as bad as the wait between ⊿ and Fushizen na Girl/Natural ni Koishite, but still longer than I would have liked it to be. The first glimpse of Laser Beam came when Perfume announced the song would be used to endorse Kirin, a brand of fruity, delicious adult drinks (if you know what I mean). The snippet was only about 15 seconds long from what I remember, but I was hooked. Then the full radio rip came out, and I was even more hooked. Laser Beam on the first listen was fast, tight, and very, very catchy. I remember jamming to it profusely when the song came out, and even more so when the PV came out. Laser Beam was just a super fun song, and in 2011, I was in dire need of a fun song.

In retrospect, even though I think Laser Beam is a strong A-side, it's not my favorite. It's not even in my top 20 Perfume songs. So what works about Laser Beam? Well, as a I said before, the hook is great. The opening instrumental to Laser Beam sounds like something out of a video game. A really fun video game where you get to blast giant polar bears with laser beams. And Laser Beam has such a distinct sound when you first hear it. In the era of commercial-friendly jingles that was JPN, Laser Beam, despite being a commercial jingle, is actually a pretty cool song. It sounds kind of like something you'd hear out of an action movie, not a drink commercial. But while Laser Beam is a very cool Perfume song, I think where it falls flat for me is that it's a little too fast. I mean, the song just kind of flies by before you even realize it's over. And the verses are a little bit lackluster compared to the really strong chorus that opens the song. But not so much that Laser Beam is a terrible song. I just think the song could have been a little longer and maybe not as frantic-sounding. But hey, at least it doesn't sound like Daijobanai. I'm still not okay with that B-side. It's probably one of the better songs of JPN era to check out if you're looking to get into Perfume.

I do want to go over the Album-mix of Laser Beam, because I don't feel I properly went over it when I reviewed JPN so many moons ago. Basically... the original Laser Beam is 10 times better than Laser Beam (Album-mix). Disregard anyone who says otherwise. They are lying. Actually, there are people who prefer the Album-mix, but I personally think it detracts some of the best parts from the original. Like that really neat opening! And the vocals in Laser Beam (Album-mix) are chopped up and distorted. There are a few cool additions, but not many and certainly not enough to make Laser Beam (Album-mix) better than the original. Overall, I just don't think the Album-mix works very well. It tries too hard to sound different, and the final result is something that sounds choppy and incomplete. My advice: stick with the original version which can be found on either the single or Perfume Global Compilation "Love the World." Other than that, I don't have much else to say about Laser Beam other than it's a really cool A-side with a very grabbing sound to it. I like Laser Beam a lot back when it came out, and looking back on it, I think it's still one of my favorite A-sides of the JPN era. It's not quite as good as Fushizen na Girl but better than Voice.

Admittedly, I don't have much to say about Laser Beam. However, I have lots to say about the PV. In fact, some of you probably remember I listed Laser Beam as one of my favorite Perfume PVs. Wonder why? Well, I will show you why and hopefully persuade you all to go watch it!


Well, the PV opens in a mysterious hallway with a mysterious man carrying a mysterious briefcase.


I'll bet that briefcase contains the data for Imitation World, Counter Attraction, Lovefool, and Juicy Fragrance.


There's the Perfume we know and love!


And they've got frickin' LASER BEAMS!!!


But will laser beams be enough to stop our fabulously-dressed antagonist?


Either way, Perfume's gonna try (and they're gonna look awesome while doing it!).


First they're gonna pull a Scooby-doo and split up!


Psst have you guys seen a sketchy guy with a briefcase?



Man alive, I forgot how good A-chan looked in this PV.


I mean dayum.


I forgot how spiffy Kashiyuka looked with side bangs too... can we bring those back?


But look, more frickin' laser beams!!! Gosh darn it, those look so cool.


Everything about this PV is cool. We haven't even gotten to the super-cool stuff yet.


But we're getting close. Sketchy Briefcase Man can't hide forever.


Until then, let's enjoy more glamorous shots of A-chan!


And Nocchi's rocking it pretty hard in this PV too.


Enough stalling! It's time for the penultimate confrontation! Perfume...


...versus Sketchy Briefcase Man. Who will prevail? Let's see!


A-chan, I don't think stern talking-to is going to make him hand over that briefcase.


See? Kashiyuka knows when there needs to be less words and more action!


> KASHIYUKA used MINI-KASHIYUKA!


> It's super effective!


But what's this!? HE LIVES!


And he's transformed into his true form! A... polar bear? A POLAR BEAR! OH NO!


How can our heroines defeat him now!?


An apple a day keeps the evil polar bears away. That's how the saying goes, right?


And now to finish this polar bear off once and for all!


That polar bear must be a vegetarian! Good thing too!


With their powers combined, the girls make...


A GIANT FRICKIN' LASER BEAM! YEAH!!!


The greatest thing ever in a Perfume PV leaves our antagonist as a sweet, benign stuffed polar bear. Adorable!


And so the day is saved and A-chan's found the 4th member of Perfume!


And we finally found out what was in that mysterious briefcase!


Another job well done for the Powerpuff- I mean Perfume! Perfume!


The dance ends with one kickass power pose and then Perfume leaves to go work on JPN. The end!

Now I don't know who remembers this, but the release date for Laser Beam/Kasuka na Kaori had to be pushed back. Because March 11, 2011 the Sendai earthquake and tsunami occurred. Originally, the single was going to be released April 20, 2011 but was pushed back to May 18. I bring this up because at the time of the earthquake, Perfume was midway through shooting the PV for Laser Beam. Hence the version that appeared on video domains like M-ON! and SSTV is an incomplete version that's around two and a half minutes long. Which is understandable, I'm sure the last thing anyone in Japan was worrying about was a full PV for Laser Beam. Still, I did wonder if there would ever be a full version of Laser Beam; the short version showed promise and a visually striking concept. Luckily, Laser Beam wasn't fated to have only a short PV. Perfume ended up filming the rest of the PV, and the full version was included on the DVD edition of their JPN album. This explains the contrast between the two sets of the PV: the white/neutral one, and the slightly more colorful, vibrant room where the girls confront the villain of the PV.

Honestly, I'm kind of glad that the producers didn't finish the original PV. I mean, I'm not happy with the circumstances that prevented it from being finished, but I like the later changes added to the PV. Because the short version, while it isn't by any means a terrible PV, it is kind of monotonous. The girls all look wonderful, and the dance is great, and there is some intrigue with the briefcase man. But most of the short PV for Laser Beam is either showing the girls walking around or making pretty poses or dancing. They do a great job at that, but two minutes and thirty-seven seconds of just that gets a little bit boring. If the PV had ended there, and a full version of Laser Beam was never completed, I'd have a much different opinion about the PV. The added scenes to Laser Beam transform the PV from just a nice-looking PV with good choreography to a fun, action-packed PV with a surprising amount of humor and silliness. As much as I love Perfume's PVs, the majority of them are always very refined and mature and sophisticated, especially as the girls have grown older. Coming after a string of artsy PVs at the time, the PV for Laser Beam is refreshingly nonsensical and fun. I mean, the girls fight a polar bear. That's ultimately defeated by an apple and the titular laser beams.

One of my favorite things about this PV is the concept: female spies. I've always been fascinated by espionage, and I love watching PVs that are a little more action-packed and aren't just posing and dancing. In Laser Beam, the girls still dance, but the climax between them and the villain is golden. From the moment they enter that room and confront the villain, it's just nonstop fun! And everything before that isn't too bad either. The girls are decked out in snazzy black getups with high heels walking around searching for a mysterious briefcase. And the mysterious villain is like something out of a Bond movie. I'd like to think of the first half of this PV as building up the tension between the villain and Perfume, increasing anticipation for the chase to end and the confrontation to begin. Laser Beam is one of Perfume's shorter songs, and surprisingly, I think the pacing for this PV is handled pretty well. I could have easily seen this PV being too hastily edited to cram everything together, but the sequence of events is actually handled pretty well. My favorite part of the PV though is definitely the ending fight scene. There's something very epic about watching the members of Perfume combine their "powers" into one giant laser beam and then taking down a polar bear.

Finally, the best month of the year has arrived! Why is June the best month? Because this month is my birthday! It's also the month in which I have many, many things going on which may or may not effect blogging. Luckily, I've caught up on pretty much everything I wanted to get caught up on last month. Maybe I can do an editorial or something this month! Now that I've graduated, I've also started compiling the things I'll need for college, like figuring out stuff for my dorm, sending in my final transcript, you know, things like that! And I go to orientation June 11-12, so I obviously won't be blogging then! And I'm taking a family vacation to New Orleans, so again, don't know how that will effect blogging. I think the place we're staying at has Wifi, but I don't think I'm going to want to spend much time on the Internet in New Orleans. Not when I can explore the St. Louis Cemetery! Also, I auditioned for a play yesterday. I'll know if I'm in the cast or not by early next week. If I do miraculously get into this play, I'll probably just be in ensemble! So that won't be such a huge commitment over my summer, but it'll still give me something to do! This month, I don't have anywhere near as many reviews I need to complete as I did in May, so I might be able to work on some editorials this month! If my brain lets me. For now, these are the releases I plan on reviewing, and hopefully I'll be able to!

Final Dance/nerve Single Review
- Well, I reviewed the PV for Final Dance last month, but I didn't have time to write a review for the single overall! Since this single was released in May, it's at the top of my list to review right now, along with the new TGS album. I'd like to get this out before I leave to go on vacation, but whether that's possible or not, I don't know. I should have free time (when I'm not packing) to write, and Final Dance/nerve is a single with just two songs on it. How hard can it be? I probably shouldn't say that... There have been some two-track singles that have been a real challenge to eke through. I think I've got stuff to talk about with this single though, especially since it's the last one for BiS. Sigh.

Fuutsu, Idol 10nen Yatterannai Desho!? PV Review
- No, you aren't hallucinating, this is a Berryz Koubou PV on my State of the Wonderland. When was the last time I reviewed them? A year ago? I think it was. It isn't my fault that Berryz has been getting singles that have ranged from weird to terrible! Admittedly, their upcoming single isn't a complete miss, and I actually like the other A-side. I've got... opinions about Fuutsu, Idol 10nen Yatterannai Desho!? Enough opinions that I think I need a whole review to comb through them. I may do a single review of this release if I find that I can't say as much about Fuutsu, Idol 10nen Yatterannai Desho!? as I thought I'd be able to. I need to start working on it at least!

Killing Me Softly Album Review
- I will actually be on a plane to New Orleans the day this album comes out, so that means I will either be listening to Killing Me Softly on the plane or typing my review on the plane. Possibly both, considering the length of the flight. For better or worse, Killing Me Softly has a lot of old songs on it, so I've pretty much got most of the apple ratings figured out. I even thought about reviewing the music video for Killing Me Softly. But I've got enough stuff on my plate to review this month, and I don't really think I could find much to talk about with the music video. I mean, it's pretty and all, but not enough for me to write a full-length review of it.

Koi Moyou Single Review
- Kus Kus is back! I was so worried Universal Music Japan had forgotten about them after Suteki na Takaramono, but they're back with a new single! Koi Moyou will be released in mid-June, but the PV is already out. I've been torn on whether to review the PV or the single for Koi Moyou. I've decided want to review the single a little bit more, just because there are three different B-side on it, and I'd really like to review them all. If I have time, I may review the music video as well, but that all depends on how much time I have. As of now, I've got four PVs planned for review this month, but who knows what other PVs will pop up along the way?

Nettaigyo no Namida PV Review
- This was actually a request from one of my lovely readers! Nettaigyo no Namida is by Flower, a group I have never reviewed before. So this will be quite the learning experience for me! Technically, I think they're a dance group, not an idol group, but so many groups I review now aren't considered idol groups. I may as well add one more to the mix! I've watched the PV for Nettaigyo no Namida by now, and I will say I'm looking forward to screencapping it. I won't say directly why, just that there are a lot of opportune shots to screencap! I've got the Berryz PV to work on first, but both are saved to my computer, so I'll start on this around the same time I do Koi Moyou!

Magi9 Playland Album Review
- Tokyo Girls' Style isn't the only five-member group that isn't considered an idol group that's releasing an album this month! 9nine is releasing Magi9 Playland, their fifth album and the only one with a forced inclusion of the number 9! There's actually a surprisingly large amount of new material on this album. Of the sixteen tracks, only three are A-sides, and none of this era's B-sides made it to the album. And some of the tracks on Magi9 Playland have some strange song titles. I'm not trying to keep any preconceived notions, considering how off mine usually are, but some of those titles are definitely... interesting. In fact, I'm very curious as to how this album will turn out.

Urahara Temptation PV or Single Review
- Speaking of idols that I haven't reviewed in a long time, hi, Kikkawa Yuu! Technically, it's not my fault on this one. Kikka hasn't released anything new since Two You, save for those two collaboration singles with a bad I can't remember. Urahara Temptation if one of two A-sides off her upcoming double A-side, but I'm not really feeling Ii jan, the other A-side. That opinion might change when I hear a better rip of Ii jan, but right now, I'm more into Urahara Temptation. However, should the PV be too cheap and/or boring to review, I may end up reviewing the single. At this point, I'm still not sure; the cover images have just been released for this single, so I still have a wait.